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I've been doing the Fonda workout: the Peter Fonda workout. That's where I wake up, take a hit of acid, smoke a joint, and run to my sister's house and ask her for money.

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She's so pure, Moses couldn't even part her knees.

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He'd make a lovely corpse.

Charles Dickens

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I am definitely not scared of Mike Tyson. I am at the top of the food chain and he is looking to knock me off. Mike's an arrogant imbecile. He sounds like a cartoon character.

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He must be the only man alive who can eat an apple through a tennis racket.

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Joan Collins unfortunately can't be with us tonight. She's busy attending the birth of her next husband.

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I once shook hands with Pat Boone and my whole right side sobered up.

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I'd love to kiss you, but I just washed my hair.

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She's got a great looking husband, a little boy and all the money in the world. She hasn't got the looks, but you can't have everything.

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He's done more U-turns than a dodgy plumber.

Iain Duncan Smith

19 Likes

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