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Jack Handy Deep Thou Quotes & Sayings
Showing search results for "Jack Handy Deep Thou" sorted by relevance. 500 matching entries found.
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QUOTES
And the LORD spake unto Moses, saying, Take the rod, and gather thou the assembly together, thou, and Aaron thy brother, and speak ye unto the rock before their eyes; and it shall give forth his water, and thou shalt bring forth to them water out of the rock: so thou shalt give the congregation and their beasts drink.
Bible
2 Likes
Drink quotes
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It's true that every time you hear a bell, an angel gets its wings. But what they don't tell you is that every time you hear a mouse trap snap, an angel gets set on fire.
Jack Handy
15 Likes
Funny quotes
Angels quotes
Thou shalt sow, but thou shalt not reap; thou shalt tread the olives, but thou shalt not anoint thee with oil; and sweet wine, but shalt not drink wine.
Bible
0 Likes
Drink quotes
The tired and thirsty prospector threw himself down at the edge of the watering hole and started to drink. But then he looked around and saw skulls and bones everywhere. Uh-oh, he thought. This watering hole is reserved for skeletons.
Jack Handy
12 Likes
Drink quotes
Whenever you read a good book, it's like the author is right there, in the room talking to you, which is why I don't like to read good books.
Jack Handy
7 Likes
Books quotes
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Thou shalt not steal. I mean defensively. On offense, indeed thou shall steal and thou must.
Branch Rickey
0 Likes
By the will art thou lost, by the will art thou found, by the will art thou free, captive, and bound.
Angelus Silesius
1 Likes
In seeking wisdom thou art wise; in imagining that thou hast attained it - thou art a fool.
Lord Chesterfield
15 Likes
Wisdom quotes
Thou god of our idolatry, the press. . . . Thou fountain, at which drink the good and wise; Thou ever-bubbling spring of endless lies; Like Eden's dread probationary tree, Knowledge of good and evil is from thee.
William Cowper
2 Likes
Drink quotes
He was a cowboy, mister, and he loved the land. He loved it so much he made a woman out of dirt and married her. But when he kissed her, she disintegrated. Later, at the funeral, when the preacher said, Dust to dust, some people laughed, and the cowboy shot them. At his hanging, he told the others, I'll be waiting for you in heaven--with a gun.
Jack Handy
19 Likes
Women quotes
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Enflaming yourselves with idols under every green tree, slaying the children in the valleys under the clifts of the rocks? Among the smooth stones of the stream is thy portion; they, they are thy lot: even to them hast thou poured a drink offering, thou hast offered a meat offering. Should I receive comfort in these? Upon a lofty and high mountain hast thou set thy bed: even thither wentest thou up to offer sacrifice.
Bible
3 Likes
Drink quotes
Ambition is like a frog sitting on a Venus Flytrap. The flytrap can bite and bite, but it won't bother the frog because it only has little tiny plant teeth. But some other stuff could happen and it could be like ambition.
Jack Handy
8 Likes
Ambition quotes
I guess I kinda lost control, because in the middle of the play I ran up and lit the evil puppet villain on fire. No, I didn't. Just kidding. I just said that to help illustrate one of the human emotions, which is freaking out. Another emotion is greed, as when you kill someone for money, or something like that. Another emotion is generosity, as when you pay someone double what he paid for his stupid puppet.
Jack Handy
15 Likes
Money quotes
For thus saith the LORD; Behold, they whose judgment was not to drink of the cup have assuredly drunken; and art thou he that shall altogether go unpunished? thou shalt not go unpunished, but thou shalt surely drink of it.
Bible
1 Likes
Drink quotes
Because you know, down deep in my heart, when all is said and done, I still live under the illusion that basically people think of me as an up-and-coming young actor.
Jack Nicholson
0 Likes
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Hast thou not procured this unto thyself, in that thou hast forsaken the LORD thy God, when he led thee by the way? / And now what hast thou to do in the way of Egypt, to drink the waters of Sihor? or what hast thou to do in the way of Assyria, to drink the waters of the river? / Thine own wickedness shall correct thee, and thy backslidings shall reprove thee: know therefore and see that it is an evil thing and bitter, that thou hast forsaken the LORD thy God, and that my fear is not in thee, saith the Lord GOD of hosts.
Bible
4 Likes
Drink quotes
Be thou incapable of change in that which is right, and men will rely upon thee. Establish unto thyself principles of action; and see that thou ever act according to them. First know that thy principles are just, and then be thou.
Akhenaton
2 Likes
Change quotes
Principles quotes
Action quotes
Most Glorious and eternal Majesty, Thou art righteous and holy in all thou dost to the sons of men, though thou hast suffered men to condemn Thy servant, Thy servant will not condemn Thee.
Christopher Love
0 Likes
Wither thou goest, I will go; and where thou lodgest, I will lodge: thy people shall be my people, and thy God my God: Where thou diest, will I die, and there will I be buried: the Lord do so to me, and more also, if aught but death part thee and me
Bible
4 Likes
Death quotes
And the king of Israel said unto Elisha, when he saw them, My father, shall I smite them? shall I smite them? And he answered, Thou shalt not smite them: wouldest thou smite those whom thou hast taken captive with thy sword and with thy bow? set bread and water before them, that they may eat and drink, and go to their master.
Bible
1 Likes
Drink quotes
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