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Funny Greeting Cards Quotes & Sayings
Showing search results for "Funny Greeting Cards" sorted by relevance. 500 matching entries found.
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QUOTES
I squirrel away sealed greeting cards that people give me so I can open them later when I'm having a bad day.
Emily Procter
5 Likes
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I ignore Hallmark Holidays. And this comes from a guy who has sold a million Opus greeting cards.
Berke Breathed
9 Likes
Famous Holiday quotes
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It's so hard. And can I say something? I thought she did a really good job. Everyone reads off cue cards. There were some people saying 'She read off cue cards!' Everyone - the cast members, the host - everyone reads off cue cards. That's how it's done, because they change the script right before, so you have to read off cue cards.
Zooey Deschanel
2 Likes
I always thought by 2013 we would have flying cars. Instead, we have blankets with sleeves.
Unknown
97 Likes
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You know, it was just another presentation of my work, and a funny one, because the cards are quite different from the normal Tarot deck, no?
H R Giger
16 Likes
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Studies clearly indicate that those who get 'Get Well' cards sooner and more often have a 80% faster recovery rate, so I want to wish you a Happy Birthday.
Unknown
305 Likes
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I had plastic surgery last week. I cut up my credit cards.
Henry Youngman
370 Likes
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Consular cards were not designed to be identification and no treaty recognizes them as such. Legal travelers, visitors and long-term residents carried passports, visas or green cards for that purpose.
Elton Gallegly
0 Likes
Like an apparently strict musical form it breaks the five minute whole into its structural parts - a descriptive preamble, the action of taking the cards, the development of the cards' manipulation and the revelation of what has been achieved.
Gavin Bryars
2 Likes
Just because Fate doesn't deal you the right cards, it doesn't mean you should give up. It just means you have to play the cards you get to their maximum potential.
Les Brown
3 Likes
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I used to collect hockey cards. It was like Vegas at my school. You'd go to school with your box of cards, and at recess and lunchtime there were all these games we'd play.
Steve Nash
7 Likes
Each player must accept the cards life deals him or her: but once they are in hand, he or she alone must decide how to play the cards in order to win the game.
Voltaire
18 Likes
Life quotes
Winning BET Awards is the equivalent of getting cards with no money in them.
Unknown
36 Likes
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Girlfriends are like credit cards, you can't get one unless you already have one.
Unknown
76 Likes
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These smugglers, many of them present in trafficking through my State of Arizona, create false Social Security cards, false green cards, visas and a variety of other fraudulent documents as an essential part of their smuggling activities.
John Shadegg
4 Likes
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Those bellhops in Miami are tip-happy. I ordered a deck of playing cards and the bellboy made fifty-two trips to my room.
Henry Youngman
43 Likes
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Consular offices make no attempt to determine whether the person obtaining the card is legally in the United States. In fact, the only people who need these cards are illegal immigrants, criminals and terrorists. Consular cards also are easily forged.
Elton Gallegly
0 Likes
I know a baseball star who wouldn't report the theft of his wife's credit cards because the thief spends less than she does.
Joe Garagiola
11 Likes
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Life consists not in holding good cards, but in playing those cards you hold well.
Unknown
12 Likes
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Dear January, how is February? Please tell March that April said May will come before June, I heard that July is getting married in August, how about September and her kids? Please send my greeting to October and don't forget to tell November that all our fans reading this will end December in happy mode.
Unknown
371 Likes
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