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One of the secrets of a long and fruitful life is to forgive everybody everything before you go to bed.
Ann Landers
3 Likes
Life quotes
Bed quotes
3 Comments
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Don't stay in bed, unless you can make money in bed.
George F Burns
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In reality, everyone is good in bed. Close eyes. Shutdown brain. Pause as necessary. Restart brain. Open eyes. What's there to not be good at? Bed is the one place where laziness is rewarded.
John Dobbin
38 Likes
Sex quotes
Bed quotes
I have to believe that it works...that when two people come together they stay together. I have to take that to bed with me at night even if I'm going to bed alone. That's a McBealism.
Ally McBeal
9 Likes
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A hospital bed is a parked taxi with the meter running.
Groucho Marx
61 Likes
Funny quotes
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Angelina Jolie may get him [Antonio Banderas] in bed for eight hours on a movie set, but I get him in bed everyday.
Melanie Griffith
1 Likes
Movies quotes
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Sex is a conversation carried out by other means. If you get on well out of bed, half the problems of bed are solved.
Peter Ustinov
7 Likes
Sex quotes
Women desire six things: They want their husbands to be brave, wise, rich, generous, obedient to wife, and lively in bed.
Geoffrey Chaucer
22 Likes
Women quotes
Bed quotes
Go back to bed, America, your government has figured out how it all transpired. Go back to bed America, your government is in control. Here, here's American Gladiators. Watch this, shut up, go back to bed America, here is American Gladiators, here is 56 channels of it! Watch these pituitary retards bang their fu..ing skulls together and congratulate you on the living in the land of freedom. Here you go America - you are free to do what well tell you! You are free to do what we tell you!
Bill Hicks
7 Likes
Government quotes
The sobs and tears of joy he had not foreseen rose with such force within him that his whole body shook and for a long time prevented him from speaking. Falling on his knees by her bed. He held his wife's hand to his lips and kissed it, and her hand responded to his kisses with weak movement of finger. Meanwhile, at the foot of the bed, in the midwife's expert hands, like the flame of a lamp, flickered the life of a human being who had never existed before...
Count Leo Tolstoy
60 Likes
Love quotes
Kissing quotes
The first girl you go to bed with is always pretty
Walter Matthau
6 Likes
Sex quotes
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Mighty proud I am that I am able to have a spare bed for my friends.
Samuel Pepys
38 Likes
Friendship quotes
My girlfriend said to me in bed last night' 'you're a pervert' I said, 'that's a big word for a girl of nine'.
Emo Philips
54 Likes
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