Steven Wright quotes
My apartment was robbed and everything was replaced with exact replicas...I told my roommate and he said 'Do I know you?'

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Suggest Revision: My apartment was robbed and everything was replaced with exact replicas...I told my roommate and he said 'Do I know you?'
 

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Steven Wright Quotes & Sayings

Below are more quotes by Steven Wright.
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 Swimming quotes 
Suggest Revision: If one synchronized swimmer drowns, do all the rest have to drown too?
 
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Suggest Revision: When I was in high school, I got in trouble with my girlfriend's Dad. He said, 'I want my daughter back by 8:15.' I said, 'The middle of August? Cool!'
 
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Suggest Revision: When I woke up this morning my girlfriend asked me,
 
 Steven Wright quotes 
 Shit Happens quotes 
Suggest Revision: The only reason people get lost in thought is because its unfamiliar territory.
 
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Suggest Revision: I'd kill for a Nobel Peace Prize.
 
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