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Funny Thank You Card Quotes & Sayings
Showing search results for "Funny Thank You Card" sorted by relevance. 500 matching entries found.
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QUOTES
As a child, a library card takes you to exotic, faraway places. When you're grown up, a credit card does it.
Sam Ewing
14 Likes
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Dear Santa, Please send your credit card numbers. its only fair since youre getting the credit for the gifts, that you should start paying for them also...
Unknown
59 Likes
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If in any divination the Tenth Card should be a Court Card, it shews that the subject of the divination falls ultimately into the hands of a person represented by that card, and its end depends mainly on him.
Arthur E Waite
0 Likes
This Christmas I've decided to put a mistletoe in my back pocket....so all the people I dont like can kiss my ass.
Unknown
719 Likes
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Dear Santa, ( ) I've been good all year. ( ) Ok most of the time. ( ) Once in a while. (X) fu.. it. I'll buy my own shit.
Unknown
917 Likes
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Theirs nothing I can say that a Hallmark card couldnt say much better...
Unknown
25 Likes
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The one thing women don't want to find in their stockings on Christmas morning is their husband.
Joan Rivers
18 Likes
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Why is Christmas just like a day at the office? You do all the work and the fat guy with the suit gets all the credit.
Unknown
17 Likes
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I stopped believing in Santa Claus when my mother took me to see him in a department store, and he asked for my autograph.
Shirley Temple
44 Likes
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Santa Claus wears a Red Suit, He must be a communist. And a beard and long hair, Must be a pacifist. What's in that pipe that he's smoking?"
Arlo Guthrie
21 Likes
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Roses are reddish, Violets are bluish, If it werent for Christmas, Wed all be Jewish.
Benny Hill
92 Likes
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The main reason Santa is so jolly is because he knows where all the bad girls live.
George Carlin
85 Likes
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Santa Claus has the right idea. Visit people once a year.
Victor Borge
25 Likes
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I never believed in Santa Claus because I knew no white dude would come into my neighborhood after dark.
Unknown
137 Likes
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Dear Santa, what I want for Christmas is... your list with names of naughty girls.
Unknown
693 Likes
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What I don't like about office Christmas parties is looking for a job the next day.
Phyllis Diller
42 Likes
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When I first got into magic, it was an underground phenomenon. Now everybody's like pick a card, any card.
Sage Francis
2 Likes
I know its not Christmas, but Santa's lap is always ready.
Unknown
143 Likes
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On the 12th day of Christmas, my Facebook gave too me, 12 stupid bi...es, 11 fake people, 10 FB hackings, 9 new po.. websites, 8 wack statuses, 7 ho.. a slurping, 6 bums a posting, 5 ignorant bastards, 4 corny birds, 3 messages, 2 ugly friends, & a girl who smashed the wholeee team.
Unknown
560 Likes
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I once bought my kids a set of batteries for Christmas with a note on it saying, toys not included.
Bernard Manning
86 Likes
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