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Groucho Marx Funny Quotes
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30 entries tagged Funny quotes by Groucho Marx.
Last updated Apr 2024
Groucho Marx Topics
Truth
Justice
Relatives
Posterity
Animals
Best Friend
Bosses
Cities
Home
Husbands
Funny Marriage
Judgement
Mothers
Death And Dying
Poverty
Principles
Smoking
America And Americans
Education
Wives
Show more
Relationship
Dirty
Best Friends
Cute
Marriage
Living
Funny
Putdowns
Bed
Military
Life
Women
Hollywood
Intelligence
Jokes
Famous
Reading
Television
Age
Love
Men And Women
Humor
Happiness
Growth
Politics
Money
Eyes
Laughter
Books
QUOTES
I find television very educating. Every time somebody turns on the set, I go into the other room and read a book.
Groucho Marx
34 Likes
Books quotes
Television quotes
Education quotes
Funny quotes
Jokes quotes
Sponsored Links
No one is completely unhappy at the failure of his best friend.
Groucho Marx
63 Likes
Funny quotes
Best Friend quotes
Outside of a dog, a book is man's best friend. Inside of a dog, it's too dark to read.
Groucho Marx
28 Likes
Friendship quotes
Funny quotes
One morning I shot an elephant in my pajamas. How he got into my pajamas I'll never know.
Groucho Marx
35 Likes
Funny quotes
Morning quotes
I could dance till the cows come home. On second thought, I'd rather dance with the cows till you come home.
Groucho Marx
30 Likes
Funny quotes
Cute quotes
Sponsored Links
Outside of a dog, a book is a man's best friend. Inside of a dog it's too dark to read.
Groucho Marx
14 Likes
Funny quotes
Best Friends quotes
Youre a woman whos been getting nothing but dirty breaks. Well, we can clean and tighten your brakes, but youll have to stay in the garage all night.
Groucho Marx
40 Likes
Funny quotes
Dirty quotes
I was married by a judge. I should have asked for a jury.
Groucho Marx
15 Likes
Funny quotes
Relationship quotes
Outside of a dog, a book is man's best friend. Inside of a dog, it's too dark to read.
Groucho Marx
617 Likes
Best Friend quotes
Funny quotes
Animals quotes
Outside of a dog, a book is man's best friend. Inside of a dog, it's too dark to read.
Groucho Marx
718 Likes
Best Friend quotes
Funny quotes
Animals quotes
Sponsored Links
Who are you going to believe, me or your own eyes?
Groucho Marx
380 Likes
Funny quotes
Truth quotes
Eyes quotes
I must confess, I was born at a very early age.
Groucho Marx
10 Likes
Funny quotes
Age quotes
When I was young I was amazed at Plutarch's statement that the elder Cato began at the age of eighty to learn Greek. I am amazed no longer. Old age is ready to undertake tasks that youth shirked because they would take too long.
Groucho Marx
9 Likes
Funny quotes
Age quotes
Age is not a particularly interesting subject. Anyone can get old. All you have to do is live long enough.
Groucho Marx
21 Likes
Funny quotes
Age quotes
I never forget a face, but in your case I'll be glad to make an exception.
Groucho Marx
20 Likes
Funny quotes
Putdowns quotes
Sponsored Links
From the moment I picked your book up until I laid it down I was convulsed with laughter. Someday I intend reading it.
Groucho Marx
4 Likes
Funny quotes
Putdowns quotes
I find television very educating. Every time somebody turns on the set, I go into the other room and read a book.
Groucho Marx
10 Likes
Funny quotes
Television quotes
Reading quotes
The secret of life is honesty and fair dealing. If you can fake that, you've got it made.
Groucho Marx
29 Likes
Funny quotes
Famous quotes
I was married by a judge. I should have asked for a jury.
Groucho Marx
23 Likes
Funny quotes
Jokes quotes
Military intelligence is a contradiction in terms.
Groucho Marx
15 Likes
Funny quotes
Intelligence quotes
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Apr 26
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