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My mother had morning sickness after I was born.
Rodney Dangerfield
10 Likes
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Human beings are the only creatures on earth that allow their children to come back home.
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Having a baby changes the way you view your in-laws. I love it when they come to visit now. They can hold the baby and I can go out.
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When I was a boy of fourteen, my father was so ignorant I could hardly stand to have the old man around. But when I got to be twenty-one, I was astonished at how much the old man had learned in seven years.
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From birth to 18 a girl needs good parents; from 18 to 35, she needs good looks. From 35 to 55, good personality. From 55 on, she needs good cash. I'm saving my money.
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