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Hilarious Status Quotes & Sayings
Showing search results for "Hilarious Status" sorted by relevance. 500 matching entries found.
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QUOTES
I wonder if a receptionist at a sperm bank has ever used the phrase: 'Thanks for coming.'
Unknown
710 Likes
Funny Facebook Status quotes
Wonder quotes
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I wish the dollar store sold gas.
Unknown
58 Likes
Facebook Status quotes
Wishes quotes
Being Broke quotes
The old problems - love, money, security, status, health, etc. - are still here to plague us or please us.
Shelley Berman
8 Likes
If I am ever in the middle of a shooting, I'll just lay on the floor and act like someone already killed me.
Unknown
117 Likes
Facebook Status quotes
I would say a crippled joke but I cant stand them.
Unknown
109 Likes
Clever Facebook Status quotes
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I've always wanted to get into a cab and yell, 'Follow that car!!!'
Unknown
662 Likes
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Why do tests on animals if we have pedophiles in prison.
Unknown
472 Likes
Funny Facebook Status quotes
Testing quotes
Hey Verification Code, I have no idea what the f*ck that says but I swear I'm human.
Unknown
37 Likes
Facebook Status quotes
There is no bigger waste of time than a shower followed by huge dump.
Unknown
42 Likes
Facebook Status quotes
When you only have $3.00 and you must choose between gas or Mc Donald's.
Unknown
29 Likes
Facebook Status quotes
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Dear hoodies, thank you for always being there for me. Sincerely, I'm s..y and I know it, I'm just way too tired to show it.
Unknown
85 Likes
Facebook Status quotes
I feel like getting something done today, so Im just going to sit here until that feeling passes.
Unknown
253 Likes
Clever Facebook Status quotes
'Results may vary.' means that it probably wont work for you at all.
Unknown
28 Likes
Facebook Status quotes
Life quotes
If your relationship status constantly changes to 'its complicated' throw in the towel and just run with "single"
Unknown
12 Likes
If she thinks 69 is just a number, she's too young for you bro.
Unknown
467 Likes
Funny Facebook Status quotes
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Cameras, action, change the status. Actor type of your favorite actress.
Common
8 Likes
I'm not sure how people get eaten by sharks...I mean how do you not hear the music?
Unknown
625 Likes
Funny Facebook Status quotes
The only reason I'd ever move to L.A. is to get away from conversations about the weather changing.
Unknown
31 Likes
Funny Facebook Status quotes
Boy or girl, I'm gonna call you 'dude' either way.
Unknown
45 Likes
Facebook Status quotes
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The awkward moment when the ticket vendor says, 'Enjoy your movie.' and then you say, 'You too!'
Unknown
72 Likes
Facebook Status quotes
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