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Teen Pregnancy Jokes Quotes & Sayings
Showing search results for "Teen Pregnancy Jokes" sorted by relevance. 500 matching entries found.
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QUOTES
And the thing about my jokes is, they don't hurt anybody. You can take 'em or leave 'em - you can say they're funny or they're terrible or they're good, or whatever, but you can just pass 'em by. But with Congress, every time they make a joke, it's a law! And every time they make a law, it's a joke!
Will Rogers
206 Likes
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Sometimes, when I'm feeling down because nothing seems to be going right, I like to take a home pregnancy test. Then I can say, 'Hey, at least I'm not pregnant.'
Daniel Tosh
159 Likes
When you gain 50 pounds during pregnancy like I did, you fear that you'll never get back in shape.
Charisma Carpenter
2 Likes
Unless you are the one who put this baby in here or the one who will take it out, you are not allowed to touch my belly!
Unknown
28 Likes
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Pregnancy quotes
There are some women whose pregnancy would make some sly bachelor smile.
Honore De Balzac
2 Likes
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I think of myself as a comedian who has the pleasure of writing jokes about things that I actually care about. And that's really it. You know, if I really wanted to enact social change I have great respect for people who are in the front lines and the trenches of trying to enact social change. I am far lazier than that.
Jon Stewart
35 Likes
Jokes quotes
Social Change quotes
The Daily Show quotes
I think of myself as a comedian who has the pleasure of writing jokes about things that I actually care about. And that's really it. You know, if I really wanted to enact social change I have great respect for people who are in the front lines and the trenches of trying to enact social change. I am far lazier than that.
Jon Stewart
59 Likes
Jokes quotes
Social Change quotes
The Daily Show quotes
I think of myself as a comedian who has the pleasure of writing jokes about things that I actually care about. And that's really it. You know, if I really wanted to enact social change I have great respect for people who are in the front lines and the trenches of trying to enact social change. I am far lazier than that.
Jon Stewart
19 Likes
Jokes quotes
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The Daily Show quotes
I'm not interested in being Wonder Woman in the delivery room. Give me drugs.
Madonna
15 Likes
Birth quotes
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After the first miscarriage, I tried to take the attitude that it was my body's way of telling me that this pregnancy wasn't meant to be.
Christie Brinkley
3 Likes
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Every four weeks I go up a bra size... it's worth being pregnant just for the breasts.
Natasha Hamilton
7 Likes
Pregnancy quotes
Bye baby, I guess you know why I had to leave. Seven months in your pregnancy, bout to have my seed.
Nas
3 Likes
I'm not interested in being Wonder Woman in the delivery room. Give me drugs.
Madonna
27 Likes
Birth quotes
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My back was just destroyed after pregnancy. I almost had to have surgery, until I did Pilates and rebuilt my body.
Melissa McCarthy
3 Likes
The worst feature of a new baby is its mothers singing.
Kin Hubbard
20 Likes
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The evidence does not support abstinence-only interventions as the best way to keep young people from unintended pregnancy.
Jonathan Klein
0 Likes
A lot of women say they love being pregnant, but I wasn't such a big fan.
Marion Jones
10 Likes
Pregnancy quotes
Most men don't become fathers until they baby is born while women have a mothers instinct during pregnancy.
Unknown
6 Likes
There is a sanctity involved with bringing a child into this world, it is better than bombing one out of it.
James Baldwin
10 Likes
Funny quotes
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My friend has a baby, I am recording all the noises he makes so I can later ask him what he meant.
Stephen Wright
15 Likes
Funny quotes
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