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Jay Leno Quotes & Sayings
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93 entries tagged including 50 subtopics.
Last updated Mar 2024
Jay Leno Topics
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QUOTES
The Kinsey Institute says gay men have bigger s.. organs. Hence the origin of gay pride.
Jay Leno
33 Likes
Funny Gay quotes
Sponsored Links
If God doesn't destroy Hollywood Boulevard, he owes Sodom and Gomorrah an apology.
Jay Leno
3 Likes
Hollywood quotes
Now see, a lot of critics are saying Arnold can't get elected because he's just an ambitious guy with a famous name, who doesn't know anything about running the government. Didn't hurt George Bush.
Jay Leno
18 Likes
Famous quotes
For the first time ever, overweight people outnumber average people in America. Doesn't that make overweight the average then? Last month you were fat, now you're average - hey, let's get a pizza!
Jay Leno
2 Likes
The Supreme Court has ruled that they cannot have a nativity scene in Washington, D.C. This wasn't for any religious reasons. They couldn't find three wise men and a virgin.
Jay Leno
2 Likes
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You can't stay mad at somebody who makes you laugh.
Jay Leno
3 Likes
Al Gore has found a new job. He is going to teach journalism at Columbia University, which is ironic isn't it? The guy who did all the coke winds up going to the White House, the guy who didn't do coke goes to Columbia.
Jay Leno
12 Likes
Politics quotes
Journalism quotes
Jobs quotes
According to New York publishers, Bill Clinton will get more money for his book than Hillary Clinton got for hers. Well, duh. At least his book has some s.. in it.
Jay Leno
2 Likes
Books quotes
America And Americans quotes
Bush said today he is being stalked. He said wherever he goes, people are following him. Finally, someone told him, 'Psst. That's the Secret Service.'
Jay Leno
2 Likes
Presidency quotes
Forty million Americans smoked marijuana; the only ones who didn't like it were Judge Ginsberg, Clarence Thomas and Bill Clinton.
Jay Leno
13 Likes
Marijuana quotes
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If we go down in flames, we will be laughing on the way down, believe me.
Jay Leno
2 Likes
For the first time ever, overweight people outnumber average people in America. Doesn't that make overweight the average then? Last month you were fat, now you're average, hey, let's get a pizza!
Jay Leno
3 Likes
According to New York publishers, Bill Clinton will get more money for his book than Hillary Clinton got for hers. Well, duh. At least his book has some s.. in it.
Jay Leno
2 Likes
Money quotes
Al Jazeera aired a new tape of Osama bin Laden. It was the usual stuff, he called Bush evil, the Great Satan, called him a war monger. Basically, the same thing you heard at last night's Democratic debate.
Jay Leno
1 Likes
Do you know what White House correspondents call actors who pose as reporters? Anchors.
Jay Leno
1 Likes
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Here's something to think about: How come you never see a headline like 'Psychic Wins Lottery'?
Jay Leno
2 Likes
I think high self-esteem is overrated. A little low self-esteem is actually quite good. Maybe you're not the best, so you should work a little harder.
Jay Leno
1 Likes
I went into a McDonald's yesterday and said, I'd like some fries. The girl at the counter said, Would you like some fries with that?
Jay Leno
1 Likes
The crime problem in New York is getting really serious. The other day the Statue of Liberty had both hands up.
Jay Leno
3 Likes
The New England Journal of Medicine reports that 9 out of 10 doctors agree that 1 out of 10 doctors is an idiot.
Jay Leno
2 Likes
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