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Funny Fb Status Post Quotes & Sayings
Showing search results for "Funny Fb Status Post" sorted by relevance. 500 matching entries found.
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I want to make a Facebook account and the name will be Nobody so when I see stupid crap people post, I can Like it. And it will say Nobody Likes This.
Unknown
14673 Likes
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That awkward moment when you post a funny status on Facebook and someone has to ruin it by commenting being all serious.
Unknown
549 Likes
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For April Fools Day, I think Facebook should switch the search box and the status update box around. So people would post updates on who they stalk.
Unknown
6546 Likes
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If I post a status and you automatically assume it's about you...Don't blame your guilty conscience on me.
Unknown
94 Likes
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I hate when people post stuff online then tell others to stay out of their business, when you post something publicly you make it everyones business.
Unknown
98 Likes
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I forgot to post on Facebook that I was going to the gym...Now this whole work-out was a waste of time.
Unknown
308 Likes
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Theres a new Facebook app that will post a final status update for you after you die. Thats ridiculous. I dont need someone to change my status when I die. I need them to water my Farmville crops.
Jimmy Fallon
60 Likes
I was going to post a status, but then I remembered I have family on Facebook...
Unknown
176 Likes
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OH NICE, so you can update your status via mobile, but you cant text me back?
Unknown
876 Likes
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Saying I don't take my meds because they make me feel funny. Is like cannibals saying they don't eat clowns because the taste funny.
Stanley Victor Paskavich
405 Likes
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Welcome to Facebook: Where ho.. call out ho.. when they should be calling out themselves, where people claim their real when really their faker then Pamela Anderson's boobies, where lame a.. dudes talk about how their balling and got money to blow but really they can't even afford a mcdouble from McDonald's and their living with their parents on the down low, where people post pics of food claiming they made it when they know damn well it's just a tv dinner, where chicks post pics wearing almost nothing trying to get as many likes as they can and they call guys desperate when their the ones looking desperate in the first place! It's more like welcome to drama-Fakebook
Bryan Burden
761 Likes
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Going to McDonald's for a salad is like going to a prostitute for a hug.
Unknown
1203 Likes
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When I was a kid, I used to sing, 'A, B, C, D, E, F, G, H, I, J, K, ELEMENO, P'
Unknown
2231 Likes
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Idealism that makes no distinction between areas where our national interest lies and those from which it is remote does no good for America. The weariness of the post-Versailles, post-Korea, post-Vietnam eras is never far from the national mood.
Dick Morris
0 Likes
There are two types of human beings found on Facebook. One who gets enormous amount of likes and comments on their posts. And the others are men.
Unknown
1102 Likes
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The best time to look for a job is when you already have one. Men apply the same theory to looking for a girlfriend.
Unknown
931 Likes
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Going to church doesn't make you a Christian any more than standing in a garage makes you a car.
Unknown
222 Likes
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I wonder if the clothes in China say, 'Made around the corner.'
Unknown
919 Likes
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Before s.... you help each other get naked, after s.. you only dress yourself. Moral of the story: in life no one helps you once you're fu..ed.
Unknown
2197 Likes
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Spent the entire night trying to create a website for women drivers, but it kept crashing.
Unknown
696 Likes
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