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Funny Status About People Quotes & Sayings
Showing search results for "Funny Status About People" sorted by relevance. 500 matching entries found.
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OH NICE, so you can update your status via mobile, but you cant text me back?
Unknown
876 Likes
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Saying I don't take my meds because they make me feel funny. Is like cannibals saying they don't eat clowns because the taste funny.
Stanley Victor Paskavich
405 Likes
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Dear people who update their Facebook status every 30 seconds, there's Twitter for a reason!
Unknown
7813 Likes
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If people could read my mind, I'd get punched in the face a lot.
Unknown
1748 Likes
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Some people should consider having multiple Facebook accounts to go along with their multiple personalities.
Unknown
737 Likes
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Relationships are like fat people, most of them don't work out.
Unknown
2419 Likes
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I want to make a Facebook account and the name will be Nobody so when I see stupid crap people post, I can Like it. And it will say Nobody Likes This.
Unknown
14673 Likes
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Going to McDonald's for a salad is like going to a prostitute for a hug.
Unknown
1203 Likes
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When I was a kid, I used to sing, 'A, B, C, D, E, F, G, H, I, J, K, ELEMENO, P'
Unknown
2231 Likes
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Sometimes one middle finger isn't enough to let someone know how you feel. That's why you have two hands.
Unknown
984 Likes
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This Christmas I've decided to put a mistletoe in my back pocket....so all the people I dont like can kiss my ass.
Unknown
719 Likes
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I wonder how some people can keep up with both their Tumblr, Twitter, Facebook...I cant even keep up with the Kardashians.
Unknown
313 Likes
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When people call you photogenic, they're actually trying to tell you that you look uglier than your pics..
Ritu Ghatourey
1439 Likes
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I hate two-faced people. It's so hard to decide which face to slap first.
Unknown
764 Likes
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It's funny how a hello is always accompanied with a goodbye. It's funny how good memories can make you cry, it's funny how forever never seems to last, it's funny how much you would lose if you forgot about your past, it's funny how friends can just leave when you're down, it's funny how when you need someone they never are around, it's funny how people change and think they're so much better, it's funny how some many lies are packed into one love letter, it's funny how one night can hold so much regret, it's funny how you can forgive but not forget, it's funny how ironic life turns out to be, but the funniest part of all, is that none of that is funny to me.
Unknown
565 Likes
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If Facebook ever shuts down. You'll see people roaming the streets shoving pictures in others faces screaming 'Do you like this!?!?!.. DO YOU!?!?!'
Unknown
1647 Likes
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I hate weddings. Old people would poke me saying You're next. They stopped when I started going up to them at funerals and poking them, saying, You're next.
Unknown
3215 Likes
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Sunglasses allow an individual to stare at people without them knowing. It is Facebook in real life.
Unknown
722 Likes
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There are two types of human beings found on Facebook. One who gets enormous amount of likes and comments on their posts. And the others are men.
Unknown
1102 Likes
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The best time to look for a job is when you already have one. Men apply the same theory to looking for a girlfriend.
Unknown
931 Likes
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