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George Carlin Religion Quotes & Sayings
Showing search results for "George Carlin Religion" sorted by relevance. 500 matching entries found.
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QUOTES
When I got out of high school they retired my jersey, but it was for hygiene and sanitary reasons
George Carlin
5 Likes
Reason quotes
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When I was a kid, if a guy got killed in a western movie I always wondered who got his horse.
George Carlin
9 Likes
Movies quotes
If a movie is described as a romantic comedy you can usually find me next door playing pinball.
George Carlin
3 Likes
Movies quotes
You know an odd feeling? Sitting on the toilet eating a chocolate candy bar.
George Carlin
21 Likes
I went to a bookstore and asked the saleswoman, "Where's the self-help section?" She said if she told me, it would defeat the purpose
George Carlin
5 Likes
Libraries quotes
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I recently went to a new doctor and noticed he was located in something called the Professional Building. I felt better right away.
George Carlin
1 Likes
If a movie is described as a romantic comedy you can usually find me next door playing pinball
George Carlin
0 Likes
Movies quotes
There is only one religion, though there are a hundred versions of it.
George Bernard Shaw
6 Likes
Religion quotes
The other night I ate at a real nice family restaurant. Every table had an argument going.
George Carlin
6 Likes
Restaurants quotes
I would never want to be a member of a group whose symbol was a guy nailed to two pieces of wood.
George Carlin
5 Likes
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If any religion had the chance of ruling over England, nay Europe within the next hundred years, it could be Islam
George Bernard Shaw
5 Likes
Religion quotes
No, the religion of Jesus is a social religion.
George Whitefield
0 Likes
The very existence of flame-throwers proves that some time, somewhere, someone said to themselves, You know, I want to set those people over there on fire, but I'm just not close enough to get the job done.
George Carlin
9 Likes
Each religion, by the help of more or less myth which it takes more or less seriously, proposes some method of fortifying the human soul and enabling it to make its peace with its destiny.
George Santayana
4 Likes
Religion quotes
There's something in every atheist, itching to believe, and something in every believer, itching to doubt. ~Mignon McLaughlin, The Second Neurotic's Notebook, 1966 Religion enables us to ignore nothingness and get on with the jobs of life. ~John Updike, Self-Consciousness, 1989 A religion without the element of mystery would not be a religion at all. ~Edwin Lewis It is doubtless true that religion has been the world's psychiatrist throughout the centuries. ~Karl Menninger Religion is the metaphysics of the masses. ~Arthur Schopenhauer All religions are the same: religion is basically guilt, with different holidays. ~Cathy Ladman No religion is a true religion that does not make men tingle to their finger tips with a sense of infinite hazard. ~William Ernest Hocking The church is the great lost and found department. ~Robert Short I speak not of men's creeds - they rest between Man and his Maker. ~George Gordon, Lord Byron, Childe Harold's Pilgrimage God made s
Victor Hugo
20 Likes
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I was thinking about how people seem to read the Bible a whole lot more as they get older; then it dawned on me - they're cramming for their final exam.
George Carlin
280 Likes
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One good reason to only maintain a small circle of friends is that three out of four murders are committed by people who know the victim.
George Carlin
21 Likes
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When I was a kid, if a guy got killed in a western movie I always wondered who got his horse
George Carlin
21 Likes
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One good reason to only maintain a small circle of friends is that three out of four murders are committed by people who know the victim.
George Carlin
25 Likes
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The next time they give you all that civic bullshit about voting, keep in mind that Hitler was elected in a full, free democratic election.
George Carlin
10 Likes
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