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Happy Hilarious News Quotes & Sayings
Showing search results for "Happy Hilarious News" sorted by relevance. 500 matching entries found.
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QUOTES
News, news, news - that is what we want. You cannot beat news in a newspaper.
Arthur Christiansen
1 Likes
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I have bad news and good news. The bad news is that it's going to drop to zero tonight. The good news is that my air conditioner is working again!
Unknown
17 Likes
Funny Cold Weather Sayings quotes
The news media are, for the most part, the bringers of bad news... and it's not entirely the media's fault, bad news gets higher ratings and sells more papers than good news.
Peter McWilliams
2 Likes
I think in politics, in Congress, you often do things that are Republican, or you do things because you're a Democrat. Sometimes that's good, obviously, and sometimes that's obviously bad. But in the news business, there's no such thing as Republican or Democratic news. News is news.
J C Watts
0 Likes
I have a liberal definition of news because I think news can be what excites people. I'm not very sanctimonious about what news is and isn't.
Diane Sawyer
0 Likes
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Because the bad news is worse than you think it is, the good news is better than you think it is.
Craig Williams
16 Likes
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The news media are, for the most part, the bringers of bad news... and it's not entirely the media's fault, bad news gets higher ratings and sells more papers than good news.
Peter McWilliams
11 Likes
Media quotes
Happy holidays from someone using environmental friendliness as an excuse for being too cheap and lazy to send a real card.
Unknown
7 Likes
Hilarious Christmas quotes
Not really but I did end up auditioning for a Broadway show. It's kind of a sad story - I did go through a whole audition process which ended with a phone call: We have good news and bad news, the good news is that you got the part and the bad news is that the production is getting cancelled. So there you have it, I was almost on Broadway.
Candace Bailey
1 Likes
Never awake me when you have good news to announce, because with good news nothing presses; but when you have bad news, arouse me immediately, for then there is not an instant to be lost.
Napoleon Bonaparte
6 Likes
Events quotes
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We call them Twinkies. You've seen them on television acting the news, modeling and fracturing the news while you wonder whether they've read the news - or if they've blow-dried their brains, too.
Linda Ellerbee
5 Likes
Humor quotes
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We call them Twinkies. You've seen them on television acting the news, modeling and fracturing the news while you wonder whether they've read the news - or if they've blow-dried their brains, too.
Linda Ellerbee
8 Likes
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Fake news executives are nicer than real news executives, though real news executives are funnier than fake news executives. They dont know theyre being funny.
Stephen Colbert
491 Likes
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News is important information that may influence your investments. Noise is talk or buzz or some headline that prevents you from seeing a story clearly. News is useful. Noise is a distraction. Calling what's noise and news after the fact is easy.
Maria Bartiromo
3 Likes
The bad news is time flies like an arrow and the good news is the bow is in your hands.
Unknown
60 Likes
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Whether you're offended by me saying Happy Holidays or Merry Christmas, take comfort in knowing I don't really mean either.
Unknown
23 Likes
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Moving on to super happy fun time news.
Philip DeFranco
7 Likes
Acting like a drunk = hilarious; taking care of a drunk = horrendous. Just like making fun of ugly people = hilarious; being ugly = horrendous.
Unknown
13 Likes
Being Drunk quotes
I would not know how I am supposed to feel about many stories if not for the fact that the TV news personalities make sad faces for sad stories and happy faces for happy stories.
Dave Barry
64 Likes
One of the reasons why when Elvis dies or the Son of Sam is captured ABC News' ratings go up is because people who don't normally watch news are watching then. The question is, do you want to attract people who don't watch network news or fight over the people who do?
Roone Arledge
21 Likes
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