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Bum Philips Quotes & Sayings
Showing search results for "Bum Philips" sorted by relevance. 140 matching entries found.
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QUOTES
In our school you were searched for guns and knifes on the way in and if you didn't have any, they gave you some.
Emo Philips
9 Likes
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I discovered my wife in bed with another man, and I was crushed. So I said, 'Get off me, you two!'
Emo Philips
10 Likes
Adultery quotes
Probably the toughest time in anyone's life is when you have to murder a loved one because they're the devil.
Emo Philips
4 Likes
He taught me never to smile, which helps me when I visit disaster sites.
Emo Philips
3 Likes
Dreams can be so eye opening and interesting. They can also be annoying little bum holes.
Unknown
3 Likes
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Nice boy but hes got more nerve than a bum tooth.
Foghorn Leghorn
9 Likes
Life has a way of kicking you in the ass...or smearing chocolate on your bum.
Dominic Monaghan
4 Likes
Keep a couple wet wipes case a bum try to touch me, ew
Nicki Minaj
75 Likes
A computer once beat me at chess, but it was no match for me at kick boxing.
Emo Philips
6 Likes
Computers quotes
My girlfriend said to me in bed last night' 'you're a pervert' I said, 'that's a big word for a girl of nine'.
Emo Philips
54 Likes
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Actually, my cd was released in 1985, in return for two German missionaries and a Dutch urologist.
Emo Philips
4 Likes
I asked my girlfriend, 'Will you marry me?' She said, 'We'll have to ask my father.' So we had a seance and Jack Ruby says, 'Hello!'
Emo Philips
15 Likes
Little pains In a due hour employ'd great profit yields.
John Philips
0 Likes
Whatever happened to the good ole days, when children worked in factories?
Emo Philips
5 Likes
The word 'friend' always seems to be sneaking up on me and biting me in the bum. are there any genuine people left out there?
Unknown
4 Likes
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Ricardo Mayorga is a bum. I'd blow him out the water like my fists was torpedoes.
Floyd Mayweather
7 Likes
Those who go to bed with Ichy bum-wake up with stinky finger!
Unknown
4 Likes
Life quotes
Short quotes
When I wake up in the morning, I just can't get started until I've had that first, piping hot pot of coffee. Oh, I've tried other enemas.
Emo Philips
4 Likes
I saw a woman wearing a sweatshirt with 'Guess' on it. I said, 'Thyroid problem?'
Emo Philips
42 Likes
Funny quotes
Women quotes
When the sappy boughs Attire themselves with blooms, sweet rudiments Of future harvest.
John Philips
0 Likes
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