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Carlin Retirement Quotes & Sayings
Showing search results for "Carlin Retirement" sorted by relevance. 337 matching entries found.
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I remember when I was a kid I used to come home from Sunday School and my mother would get drunk and try to make pancakes
George Carlin
10 Likes
Children quotes
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When Thomas Edison worked late into the night on the electric light, he had to do it by gas lamp or candle. I'm sure it made the work seem that much more urgent.
George Carlin
5 Likes
I am not really retired, and may never be completely, but I can't think of a better place to contemplate retirement than New York City.
Robert MacNeil
0 Likes
Happiness is being retired and spending all of my kids' inheritance before I die!
Unknown
25 Likes
Funny quotes
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Who knows whether in retirement I shall be tempted to the last infirmity of mundane minds, which is to write a book.
Geoffrey Fisher
1 Likes
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Today more people believe in UFOs than believe that Social Security will take care of their retirement.
Scott Cook
0 Likes
I believe that social security should be a universal retirement guarantee and not means tested.
Steve Israel
0 Likes
The great thing about show business is that there's no mandatory retirement age.
Scott Bakula
0 Likes
The question isn't at what age I want to retire, it's at what income.
George Foreman
7 Likes
Retirement quotes
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Younger workers should have more freedom to build their retirement nest egg.
Gresham Barrett
0 Likes
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Frisbeetarianism is the belief that when you die, your soul goes up on the roof and gets stuck.
George Carlin
2 Likes
Belief quotes
Baseball is the only major sport that appears backward in a mirror
George Carlin
3 Likes
Baseball quotes
If churches want to play the game of politics, let them pay admission like everyone else.
George Carlin
10 Likes
Politics quotes
If it's true that our species is alone in the universe, then I'd have to say the universe aimed rather low and settled for very little.
George Carlin
8 Likes
Let a smile be your umbrella, and you'll end up with a face full of rain.
George Carlin
61 Likes
Smile quotes
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I put a dollar in one of those change machines. Nothing changed.
George Carlin
16 Likes
Funny quotes
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Those who dance are considered insane by those who cannot hear the music.
George Carlin
22 Likes
Music quotes
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We're having something a little different this year for Thanksgiving. Instead of a turkey, we're having a swan. You get more stuffing.
George Carlin
2 Likes
Funny quotes
Thanksgiving quotes
Were having something a little different this year for Thanksgiving. Instead of a turkey, were having a swan. You get more stuffing.
George Carlin
4 Likes
Funny quotes
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I am is reportedly the shortest sentence in the English language. Could it be that I do is the longest sentence?
George Carlin
13 Likes
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