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Funny Status About Justin Bieber Quotes & Sayings
Showing search results for "Funny Status About Justin Bieber" sorted by relevance. 500 matching entries found.
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Hi, I'm a shower. If you turn me on, I'll make you wet.
Mickey Anderson
230 Likes
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Wanna hear a joke about my pe..s? Never mind, it's too long.
Unknown
3462 Likes
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A drunken man was dreaming that he died and reincarnated on earth as a chicken. He became heavy and tried to lay an egg! He pushed and pushed and laid the 1st egg, then the 2nd. He was pushing to lay a 3rd egg when his wife screamed ''James! You're shitting on the bed!"
Unknown
604 Likes
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Liking your own status, is like high-fiving yourself in public...
Unknown
201 Likes
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I have an eating disorder. I be eatin DIS order of fries, and DIS order of nuggets, and DIS order of wings and so on, so on, you get it.
Unknown
291 Likes
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If you can't afford po.., just turn on women's tennis and shut your eyes...
Unknown
371 Likes
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Chicken pot pie sounds like such a good idea. If you add commas.
Unknown
336 Likes
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Hey I just met you, and girl you look crazy, what brands your make-up, Crayola maybe?
Unknown
605 Likes
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When you're putting on jeans with holes and your foot goes through the hole.
Unknown
72 Likes
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Call of Duty: MW3 comes out midnight tonight. I wonder how many relationships are going to end this week.
Unknown
539 Likes
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Going to church doesn't make you a Christian any more than standing in a garage makes you a car.
Unknown
617 Likes
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I don't care what they say, the first guy who milked a cow and drank it was a massive pervert.
Unknown
883 Likes
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Thanks for inviting me to your baby shower, it reminded me to take my birth control pill.
Unknown
205 Likes
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If State Farm were such a good neighbor they'd come over and pick up all the dog shit in my yard.
Unknown
775 Likes
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If you don't have an iPhone I feel bad for you, son. I got 99 Emojis & you can't see none.
Unknown
187 Likes
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Whenever I talk with someone who stutters...I yell 'REMIX!' so they feel cool and shit.
Unknown
142 Likes
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Is wondering who was the first to look at a cow and think: I'll squeeze these dangly things here, and drink whatever comes out!
Unknown
223 Likes
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I don't see why everybody wants a white iPhone. Everyone knows the black one runs faster.
Unknown
575 Likes
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When I kill a bug in my house, I leave the dead body around for a bit to warn the others.
Unknown
436 Likes
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Why is it when you run into a spider web, you suddenly turn into a ninja?
Unknown
2640 Likes
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