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Mature Fb Status Quotes & Sayings
Showing search results for "Mature Fb Status" sorted by relevance. 500 matching entries found.
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QUOTES
You wanna cry? Try using a tissue, it works much better than your Facebook status.
Unknown
360 Likes
Witty Facebook Status quotes
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I decided to burn some calories so I set a fat kid on fire.
Unknown
281 Likes
Funny Facebook Status quotes
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I dont mind ketchup on my hot dog, as long as the bun is tight.
Jon Lajoie
412 Likes
Funny Facebook Status quotes
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The Titanic is a great lesson of why just the tip can get you in a lot of trouble.
Nikhil Saluja
487 Likes
Funny Facebook Status quotes
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Our deepest sympathies to Aaron Hernandez's fellow prison inmates on not getting someone as pretty as Tom Brady.
Unknown
47 Likes
Facebook Status quotes
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I will complain about my privacy being invaded by the government right after I update my dating profile to attract strangers on the internet.
Unknown
57 Likes
Facebook Status quotes
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At least my job description doesn't involve repairing the economy or being the new head football coach at Penn State.
Unknown
35 Likes
Facebook Status quotes
Funny Facebook Status quotes
Theres a new Facebook app that will post a final status update for you after you die. Thats ridiculous. I dont need someone to change my status when I die. I need them to water my Farmville crops.
Jimmy Fallon
60 Likes
Somebody needs to start a restaurant called, 'Chick-Fil-Atheist' that's only open on Sunday.
Unknown
215 Likes
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It's a Facebook status not a diary. Learn the difference....
Unknown
779 Likes
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I really think it would be cowardly to pull back and not challenge the status quo, when the status quo may not be the right way for the field to go.
Mehmet Oz
2 Likes
'Are you athletic?' Yes, I surf the Net.
Unknown
632 Likes
Funny Facebook Status quotes
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Congratulations on buying a car that will go 0-60 in 5 seconds whether you want it to or not.
Unknown
56 Likes
Facebook Status quotes
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Unless your name is GOOGLE...stop acting like you KNOW EVERYTHING...
Unknown
1570 Likes
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I was going to post a status, but then I remembered I have family on Facebook...
Unknown
176 Likes
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You're so much better than A-Rod at concealing your drug use on the job.
Unknown
50 Likes
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Facebook Status quotes
If you want to cry use a tissue, not your Facebook status.
Unknown
313 Likes
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Scientist say that universe is made up of Electrons, Protons and Neutrons...They forgot to mention MORONS...
Unknown
396 Likes
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You know what guys & parking spaces have in common? The good ones are always taken and the only ones left are handicaps.
Nishan Panwar
366 Likes
Clever Facebook Status quotes
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When you have a kid, you have to be more mature.
Sofia Vergara
5 Likes
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