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I Wish I Had A Button In My Quotes & Sayings
Showing search results for "I Wish I Had A Button In My" sorted by relevance. 119 matching entries found.
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QUOTES
A man of forty today has nothing to worry him but falling hair, inability to button the top button, failing vision, shortness of breath, a tendency of the collar to shut off all breathing, trembling of the kidneys to whatever tune the orchestra is playing, and a general sense of giddiness when the matter of rent is brought up. Forty is Life's Golden Age.
Robert Benchley
20 Likes
Funny quotes
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"You ever walk behind someone walking so slow slow you have to hold yourself back from stabbing them? '...You better move it along, huh. My walker has wheels for a reason." You ever walk next to that stranger who wants to walk the same speed as you? '...Get the fu.. away from me... what are we--on a date here? I don't even know you.' Sometimes I find myself being a weirdo... you ever been walking next to some stranger and for no reason at all you decide that if you beat them to the corner, you'll be a millionaire? They're like, 'whatever'. HAHA! I get to press the walk button for you! ... You think those walk buttons do anything? I think some guy at the government was like, 'What can we give the morons to press? How bout a button!?' You always press 'em, you're like, '...maybe I didn't press it hard enough...' Then someone will come up and be like, 'Did you press it?' --'Yeah, I pressed it.' They're like, 'Why don't you press it again?'--'You're like, 'Yeah I'll press it again.' Then a
Jim Gaffigan
62 Likes
Comedy quotes
Humor quotes
"You ever walk behind someone walking so slow slow you have to hold yourself back from stabbing them? '...You better move it along, huh. My walker has wheels for a reason." You ever walk next to that stranger who wants to walk the same speed as you? '...Get the fu.. away from me... what are we--on a date here? I don't even know you.' Sometimes I find myself being a weirdo... you ever been walking next to some stranger and for no reason at all you decide that if you beat them to the corner, you'll be a millionaire? They're like, 'whatever'. HAHA! I get to press the walk button for you! ... You think those walk buttons do anything? I think some guy at the government was like, 'What can we give the morons to press? How bout a button!?' You always press 'em, you're like, '...maybe I didn't press it hard enough...' Then someone will come up and be like, 'Did you press it?' --'Yeah, I pressed it.' They're like, 'Why don't you press it again?'--'You're like, 'Yeah I'll press it again.' Then a
Jim Gaffigan
40 Likes
Humor quotes
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There's a button that goes On and I'm On. And when I go On, there is almost no me; there is just a character who is doing all this.
Gisele Bundchen
0 Likes
If one elevator button has a star on it, I'm pressing it.
BJ Novak
1 Likes
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They were two halves that together formed a magical whole.
Dick Button
5 Likes
You may not like the humor, but that is why every radio has an on-off button.
Mel Karmazin
3 Likes
You push the button, we do the rest.
George Eastman
2 Likes
Babe there's not a button that I cant reach.
Dierks Bentley
0 Likes
Where's the button that makes time stand still...I need a break.
Unknown
15 Likes
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If you die in an elevator, be sure to push the Up button
Michael Blackson
16 Likes
Never, never, never, never, never! Pray you, undo this button.
William Shakespeare
0 Likes
Prayer quotes
Click-kitty clack that like button.
Philip DeFranco
4 Likes
Now there she go again riding through the stormy weather. You better button up if you wanna go get her.
Baby Bash
16 Likes
You see that blue follow button? I'd tap that!
Unknown
318 Likes
Instagram Bios quotes
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Not many get a chance to hit the career re-set button.
Jason Bateman
0 Likes
Push a button on these broke boys, that's detonation.
Rick Ross
10 Likes
The answer is.. day one, I had to pull the eject button.
Jersey Shore
1 Likes
Nudists are people who wear one-button suits
Samuel Johnson
0 Likes
Freedom quotes
I wish my bladder had a snooze button.
Unknown
36 Likes
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