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Witty Quotes About Funny
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59 Witty quotes tagged with Funny.
QUOTES
Keep rolling your eyes. Maybe you'll find a brain back there.
Unknown
361 Likes
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Opportunity tends to knock once, then it's gone...temptation, however, likes to stand there and lean on the damn doorbell!
Sarah Moores
132 Likes
Witty quotes
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Life quotes
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Some people are just like some schools during summer, they have, NO CLASS.
Unknown
578 Likes
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Diplomacy is the art of telling people to go to hell in such a way that they ask for the directions!!
Unknown
124 Likes
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When people ask me plz because it's shorter than please. I tell them no because it's shorter than yes .
Unknown
357 Likes
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Want to make a good first impression on a guy? Ask questions about him, seem interested, listen, giggle and swallow.
Family Guy
172 Likes
Dating quotes
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My life is all math. I am trying to add to my income, subtract from my weight, divide my time, and avoid multiplying.
Unknown
163 Likes
Funny quotes
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If the 2 pencil is the most popular, why is it still 2?
Unknown
224 Likes
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When I said I'd hit that I meant with my car.
Unknown
400 Likes
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If life gives you lemons don't make a fu..ing lemonade take the sh..ty lemons and throw them at the assole who's making your life hard.
Peta-Gaye Clark
80 Likes
Funny quotes
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Life quotes
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I thought of you today. I saw a cockroach and you crossed my mind. I stepped on it.
Jazmin Garcia
380 Likes
Witty quotes
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If opinions are like assholes then you are like an opinion.
Unknown
83 Likes
Funny quotes
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Winner of Worlds Best Wife Award. Category; Nagging.
Unknown
35 Likes
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A man with a dream. A very simple dream, mostly involving nachos and beer, but a dream nonetheless.
Marc MacKenzie
53 Likes
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Trying to change the name from Tweeting to Gregging.
Unknown
28 Likes
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Lover of pork, runner...cause of all the pork.
Unknown
37 Likes
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Absolutely awkward, proud nerd & geek, decreaser of world suck.
Unknown
37 Likes
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Another papercut survivor.
Unknown
74 Likes
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Good Samaritan, washed-up athlete, especially gifted napper.
Unknown
65 Likes
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Where the hell am I, and how did I get here?
Unknown
64 Likes
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