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Funny Crushed Up Day Quotes & Sayings
Showing search results for "Funny Crushed Up Day" sorted by relevance. 500 matching entries found.
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QUOTES
May your Boss's Day consist of terrified employees awkwardly lavishing you with gifts they can barely afford.
Unknown
5 Likes
Funny quotes
Bosses Day quotes
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Start the day off right...On the toilet...Shitting out yesterday's bullshit getting ready to digest today.
Marlon Wayans
65 Likes
Funny quotes
Life quotes
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It's not a gift of mine, but one given to me, to be able to criticise myself and not be crushed, by myself or by others.
John Malkovich
0 Likes
If you saw a dog going to be crushed under a car, wouldn't you help him?
Oskar Schindler
83 Likes
It is the destiny of mint to be crushed.
Waverley Lewis Root
0 Likes
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I smile because you're my Mother. I laugh because there's nothing you can do about it. Happy Mom's Day!
Unknown
245 Likes
Mothers Day quotes
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I carry a magnum size condom in my purse like a modern day glass slipper. Some day my prince will come.
Unknown
412 Likes
Funny Facebook Status quotes
Im choosing my words carefully cause Im sure, when it comes to being naked with Jennifer Aniston, they will be printed. But, believe it or not, it was just really silly, fun, funny and entertaining, at the end of the day.
Charlie Day
261 Likes
Valentine's Day money-saving tip: Break up on February 13th, get back together on the 15th.
David Letterman
106 Likes
Funny quotes
Valentines Day quotes
My heart is crushed by a former love. Can you help me find a way to carry on again?
All American Rejects
16 Likes
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I discovered my wife in bed with another man, and I was crushed. So I said, 'Get off me, you two!'
Emo Philips
0 Likes
I'm honoring you this Boss's Day by spending only half my workday on email, social media, dating sites, and po..ography.
Unknown
6 Likes
Funny quotes
Bosses Day quotes
Ever have that one friend who gets a Valentine's Day gift for their mother? Doens't that freak you out a little? It's like, 'I don't know how to break this to you but I think she's banging your dad!
Russ Meneve
64 Likes
Funny quotes
Valentines Day quotes
Those special people who believe in others give them the courage to succeed. It really means a lot to work with someone who's so understanding & supportive. Have a Great Day
Unknown
15 Likes
Funny quotes
Bosses Day quotes
Happy Mother's Day to someone who deserves a much better Mother's Day than I'm capable of pulling off without her help.
Unknown
29 Likes
Funny quotes
Happy Mothers Day quotes
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I'm missing a knuckle, it's crushed inside my hand at the moment.
Trish Stratus
1 Likes
I discovered my wife in bed with another man, and I was crushed. So I said, 'Get off me, you two!'
Emo Philips
10 Likes
Adultery quotes
For April Fools Day, I think Facebook should switch the search box and the status update box around. So people would post updates on who they stalk.
Unknown
6546 Likes
Funny quotes
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Since today is Valentine's day, I was wondering if you'd like to go back to MySpace, so I can Twitter with your Yahoo, until I Google all over your Facebook and we can Instagram our date... ;) Happy Valentine's Day, Everyone!!
Unknown
495 Likes
Funny Facebook Status quotes
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Humor has historically been tied to the mores of the day. The Yellow Kid was predicated on what people thought was funny about the immigrant Irish. When you're different in a society, you're funny.
Will Eisner
8 Likes
Humor quotes
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