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Funny Wishes For Doctor Quotes & Sayings
Showing search results for "Funny Wishes For Doctor" sorted by relevance. 500 matching entries found.
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When the BBC decided to bring Doctor Who back as a feature film a few years ago, one national newspaper ran a poll to ask its readers who should be the new Doctor, and I topped it.
Simon Callow
2 Likes
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I told my doctor I get very tired when I go on a diet, so he gave me pep pills. Know what happened? I ate faster.
Joe E Lewis
9 Likes
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According to the doctor who performed his autopsy report, Michael Jackson was mostly in fine physical shape when he died. The doctor then added, 'Oh- nope- hang on, I had the chart upside down, god no in heaven
Seth Meyers
6 Likes
Wishes are an emotionally weak person's way of facing the world. Don't wish what you want, go out and pursue it. The difference in wishes and reality is the effort you put between the two.
Frederick A Babb
73 Likes
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I went to my doctor and asked for something for persistent wind. He gave me a kite. You see the trouble is he's very old fashioned. When he gives you an injection you have to bite on a bullet.
Les Dawson
59 Likes
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Last christmas my sister, Geri, gave me a lovely Cloth calendar. It only took me 5 hours to sew in a Doctor's appointment...
Robert Paul
67 Likes
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An apple a day keeps the doctor away, But if the doctor is cute forget the fruit...
Unknown
190 Likes
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Courage isn't a matter of not being frightened, you know. It's being afraid and doing what you have to do anyway. -The Third Doctor
Doctor Who
62 Likes
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He told me he was working as an interpreter in a doctor's office in Brookline, Massachusetts, where I was living at the time, and he was translating for a doctor who had a number of Russian patients. On my way home, after running into him, I just heard this phrase in my head.
Jhumpa Lahiri
4 Likes
Never go to a doctor whose office plants have died.
Erma Bombeck
45 Likes
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I wonder why you can always read a doctor's bill and you can never read his prescription.
Finley Peter Dunne
19 Likes
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For my high colestorol my doctor prescribed me a boyfriend.
Loesje
18 Likes
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God heals and the doctor takes the fee.
Benjamin Franklin
33 Likes
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I know of nothing more laughable than a doctor who does not die of old age.
Voltaire
4 Likes
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My doctor told me to watch my drinking, so now I drink in front of a mirror.
Unknown
124 Likes
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My brother is gay and my parents don't care, as long as he marries a doctor.
Elayne Boosler
66 Likes
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They say you shouldn't lie to your doctor. But admit it, if they ask if you've ever had s.., and your mom is right there, you're gonna say no.
Risa Schizophrenia
517 Likes
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It's funny how a hello is always accompanied with a goodbye. It's funny how good memories can make you cry, it's funny how forever never seems to last, it's funny how much you would lose if you forgot about your past, it's funny how friends can just leave when you're down, it's funny how when you need someone they never are around, it's funny how people change and think they're so much better, it's funny how some many lies are packed into one love letter, it's funny how one night can hold so much regret, it's funny how you can forgive but not forget, it's funny how ironic life turns out to be, but the funniest part of all, is that none of that is funny to me.
Unknown
565 Likes
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I wish more things in my life could be blamed on auto-correct.
Unknown
37 Likes
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I went to see my doctor with a nasty pain in the ass. Turns out he's already met my wife.
Nikhil Saluja
350 Likes
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