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Funny Funny Thanksgiving Quotes & Sayings
Showing search results for "Funny Funny Thanksgiving" sorted by relevance. 500 matching entries found.
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No One Diets on Thanksgiving. What we're really talking about is a wonderful day set aside on the fourth Thursday of November when no one diets. I mean, why else would they call it Thanksgiving?
Erma Bombeck
14 Likes
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It's funny how a hello is always accompanied with a goodbye. It's funny how good memories can make you cry, it's funny how forever never seems to last, it's funny how much you would lose if you forgot about your past, it's funny how friends can just leave when you're down, it's funny how when you need someone they never are around, it's funny how people change and think they're so much better, it's funny how some many lies are packed into one love letter, it's funny how one night can hold so much regret, it's funny how you can forgive but not forget, it's funny how ironic life turns out to be, but the funniest part of all, is that none of that is funny to me.
Unknown
565 Likes
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I want to take you home for Thanksgiving to meet the people who made me turn out this way.
Unknown
23 Likes
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Sorry your girlfriend is too young to sit with us at the adult table this Thanksgiving.
Unknown
8 Likes
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We're having something a little different this year for Thanksgiving. Instead of a turkey, we're having a swan. You get more stuffing.
George Carlin
2 Likes
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If you haven't been invited to an awful family Thanksgiving get-together of your own you can come to mine.
Unknown
12 Likes
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One reason I live with my parents is to beat Thanksgiving traffic.
Unknown
13 Likes
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Were having something a little different this year for Thanksgiving. Instead of a turkey, were having a swan. You get more stuffing.
George Carlin
4 Likes
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Thanksgiving, when the Indians said, Well, this has been fun, but we know you have a long voyage back to England.
Jay Leno
12 Likes
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The only parade I'll attend this Thanksgiving is the one to the toilet.
Unknown
15 Likes
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Thanksgiving is Americas national chow-down feast, the one occasion each year when gluttony becomes a patriotic duty.
Michael Dresser
3 Likes
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If you think Independence Day is Americas defining holiday, think again. Thanksgiving deserves that title, hands-down.
Tony Snow
6 Likes
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Thanksgiving dinners take eighteen hours to prepare. They are consumed in twelve minutes. Half-times take twelve minutes. This is not coincidence.
Erma Bombeck
11 Likes
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Thanksgiving, you get food. Christmas, you get gifts. New Year's, you have drinks. Valentine's, you have s... Birthday, you can do all of the above.
Unknown
63 Likes
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Thanksgiving is an emotional holiday. People travel thousands of miles to be with people they only see once a year. And then discover once a year is way too often.
Johnny Carson
11 Likes
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Let's spend Thanksgiving spilling food on our clothes, and Black Friday buying new ones.
Unknown
36 Likes
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Happy Thanksgiving to someone I'd have no problem stomping to death on Black Friday.
Unknown
43 Likes
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If it tastes funny, don't eat it. If it looks funny, call a doctor. If it is funny, it must have been something I said.
Unknown
189 Likes
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Make sure the clothes you buy on Black Friday take into account how fat you got on Thanksgiving.
Unknown
79 Likes
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I'm not so funny. Gilda was funny. I'm funny on camera sometimes. In life, once in a while. Once in a while. But she was funny. She spent more time worrying about being liked than anything else.
Gene Wilder
2 Likes
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