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Funny Humor Clever Quotes & Sayings
Showing search results for "Funny Humor Clever" sorted by relevance. 500 matching entries found.
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Sometimes one middle finger isn't enough to let someone know how you feel. That's why you have two hands.
Unknown
984 Likes
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The dictionary is the only place where success comes before work.
Mark Twain
741 Likes
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Instead of cleaning my house, I just watched an episode of Hoarders. Now I don't feel so bad.
Unknown
98 Likes
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For sheer s..iness, a man must be beautiful. Funny. yes. Clever, no.
Jilly Cooper
13 Likes
I am so clever that sometimes I don't understand a single word of what I am saying.
Unknown
4 Likes
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The best time to look for a job is when you already have one. Men apply the same theory to looking for a girlfriend.
Unknown
931 Likes
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We have always had gross humor. But we try for funny, not gross.
Shawn Wayans
2 Likes
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When people call you photogenic, they're actually trying to tell you that you look uglier than your pics..
Ritu Ghatourey
1439 Likes
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Better late than never, but never late is better.
Drake
3482 Likes
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I would say a crippled joke but I cant stand them.
Unknown
109 Likes
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I am so clever that sometimes I don't understand a single word of what I am saying.
Oscar Wilde
26 Likes
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Pick up lines never work...I think someone clever, witty and funny is very attractive.
Kate Upton
10 Likes
True love is waking up next to your partner and thinking Well, I could smother them with a pillow or make breakfast. Sigh. Pancakes it is.
Unknown
468 Likes
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A thousand clever lines unread on clever napkins
Taking Back Sunday
2 Likes
The stone age was marked by man's clever use of crude tools; the information age, to date, has been marked by man's crude use of clever tools.
Unknown
17 Likes
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Going to church doesn't make you a Christian any more than standing in a garage makes you a car.
Unknown
222 Likes
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My s.. life is like a Ferrari...I don't have a Ferrari.
Unknown
277 Likes
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I don't know what humor is. Anything that's funny -- tragedy or anything, it don't make no difference so [long as] you happen to hit it just right. But there's one thing I'm proud of -- I ain't got it in for anybody. I don't like to make jokes that hurt anybody.
Will Rogers
6 Likes
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War doesn't determine who's right. War determines who's left.
Unknown
854 Likes
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I think I should tell you what people are saying behind your back....Nice ass.
Unknown
148 Likes
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