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Funny Restaurant Menus Quotes & Sayings
Showing search results for "Funny Restaurant Menus" sorted by relevance. 500 matching entries found.
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Jesse's funny and easy to talk to. I'm a really big dork, and instead of making fun of me, he goes along with it. It may be weird to some people, but I wasn't playing 'Katie' in that video, I was playing someone else. Even though that video was how a lot of people learned about our dating, it wasn't like Katie kissing Jesse. It was the girl int he video kissing the guy in the video.
Katie Cassidy
64 Likes
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When we drink, we get drunk. When we get drunk, we fall asleep. When we fall asleep, we commit no sin. When we commit no sin, we go to heaven. So, let's all get drunk, and go to heaven!
Unknown
51 Likes
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The stone age was marked by man's clever use of crude tools; the information age, to date, has been marked by man's crude use of clever tools.
Unknown
17 Likes
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A smile is a sign of joy, a hug is a sign of love, a laugh is a sign of happiness and a friend like me... well ...that's a sign of good taste.
Unknown
320 Likes
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Heaven is an American salary, a Chinese cook, an English house, and a Japanese wife. Hell is defined as having a Chinese salary, an English cook, a Japanese house, and an American wife.
James H Kabbler III
25 Likes
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They came down on my 50th birthday to the Whisky and played 45 minutes of old Mot�rhead songs! I always thought Metallica were good from day one. But when I first met Lars Ulrich, he was a horrible mouthy brat, same as he is now. He was head of Mot7ouml;rhead's West Coast fan club; what he didn't tell us was that he and Cliff [Burton, Metallica's original bassist] were the only members! Lars is a true friend. I'd hide him even if he were charged for murder. And Jimmy [James Hetfield] is frickin' funny as shit. I wish he wouldn't take everything so seriously, though. It seems to be messing with his head.
Motorhead
42 Likes
CUPID, n. The so-called god of love. This bastard creation of a barbarous fancy was no doubt inflicted upon mythology for the sins of its deities. Of all unbeautiful and inappropriate conceptions this is the most reasonless and offensive. The notion of symbolizing s..ual love by a semis..less babe, and comparing the pains of passion to the wounds of an arrow --of introducing this pudgy homunculus into art grossly to materialize the subtle spirit and suggestion of the work --this is eminently worthy of the age that, giving it birth, laid it on the doorstep of prosperity.
Ambrose Bierce
24 Likes
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I have to hand it to NBC. They've done a great job sticking with this show and they really do believe in it comedically. And yes, there really is a groundswell that is growing in support for the show. It's so funny because you read these things about our ratings and about our demographic. Our best demographic is young males, like college students and twenty-somethings love it and then rich people love it. Rich families with incomes over a hundred thousand dollars. So you've got rich people (laughs) and young guys especially watching it, and a lot of young girls too.
Rainn Wilson
2 Likes
No, I am not single. I am in a long distance relationship because my boyfriend lives in the FUTURE.
Unknown
433 Likes
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O loss of sight, of thee I most complain! Blind among enemies, O worse than chains, dungeon or beggary, or decrepit age! Light, the prime work of God, to me is extinct, and all her various objects of delight annulled, which might in part my grief have eased. Inferior to the vilest now become of man or worm; the vilest here excel me, they creep, yet see; I, dark in light, exposed to daily fraud, contempt, abuse and wrong, within doors, or without, still as a fool, in power of others, never in my own; scarce half I seem to live, dead more than half.
John Milton
10 Likes
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Smart Man + Smart Woman = Romance. Smart Man + Dumb Woman = Affair. Dumb Man + Smart Woman = Marriage. Dumb Man + Dumb Woman = Pregnancy.
Unknown
704 Likes
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Now there are more overweight people in America than average-weight people. So overweight people are now averagewhich means, you have met your New Year's resolution.
Jay Leno
16 Likes
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Me? Behave? Seriously!! As a child I saw Tarzan almost naked, Cinderella arrived home after midnight, Pinocchio told lies, Aladdin was a thief, Batman drove over 200 miles an hour, Snow White lived in a house with 7 men, Popeye smoked a pipe & had tattoos, Pac Man ran around to digital music while eating pills that enhanced his performance & Shaggy and Scooby-doo were mystery solving hippies that always had the munchies. The fault is not mine!
Unknown
599 Likes
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If you hadn't seen what we looked like, you would have thought we were a punk band. I remember going down to the [London club] Roxy one night just to see what the punk thing was all about. I was standing at the bar, and this bush behind me said, "I used to sell acid at [Hawkwind's] all-night shows in King's Cross." And I turned around and it was Johnny Rotten. I remembered him: He used to have long hair, with pockets full of drugs. It's funny, though -- I never liked the Clash. They sounded like old music, dressed up as punk. The Ramones were geniuses, though. Joey especially had a nose for rock'n'roll, and we were friends, although we weren't close when he died. I hate to see people on the way out; I prefer to remember him as he was.
Motorhead
19 Likes
What do you mean? Do you wish me a good morning, or mean that it is a good morning whether I want it or not; or that you feel good on this morning; or that it is a morning to be good on?
JRR Tolkien
160 Likes
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The law of God, as quite plainly expressed in woman's construction, is this: There shall be no limit put upon your intercourse with the other s.. s..ually, at any time of life. During twenty-three days in every month (in the absence of pregnancy) from the time a woman is seven years old till she dies of old age, she is ready for action, and competent. As competent as the candlestick is to receive the candle. Competent every day, competent every night. Also, she wants that candle yearns for it, longs for it, hankers after it, as commanded by the law of God in her heart.
Mark Twain
17 Likes
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There are plenty of teams in every sport that have great players and never win titles. Most of the time, those players aren't willing to sacrifice for the greater good of the team. The funny thing is, in the end, their unwillingness to sacrifice only makes individual goals more difficult to achieve. One thing I believe to the fullest is that if you think and achieve as a team, the individual accolades will take care of themselves. Talent wins games, but teamwork and intelligence win championships.
Michael Jordan
98 Likes
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Theres good weird people and bad weird people. Good weird people are funny but the bad weird people are the ones you see wearing capes around.
Unknown
3 Likes
There are plenty of teams in every sport that have great players and never win titles. Most of the time, those players aren't willing to sacrifice for the greater good of the team. The funny thing is, in the end, their unwillingness to sacrifice only makes individual goals more difficult to achieve. One thing I believe to the fullest is that if you think and achieve as a team, the individual accolades will take care of themselves. Talent wins games, but teamwork and intelligence win championships.
Michael Jordan
23 Likes
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There are plenty of teams in every sport that have great players and never win titles. Most of the time, those players aren't willing to sacrifice for the greater good of the team. The funny thing is, in the end, their unwillingness to sacrifice only makes individual goals more difficult to achieve. One thing I believe to the fullest is that if you think and achieve as a team, the individual accolades will take care of themselves. Talent wins games, but teamwork and intelligence win championships.
Michael Jordan
17 Likes
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