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Funny Sober Quotes & Sayings
Showing search results for "Funny Sober" sorted by relevance. 500 matching entries found.
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Saying I don't take my meds because they make me feel funny. Is like cannibals saying they don't eat clowns because the taste funny.
Stanley Victor Paskavich
405 Likes
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The sway of alcohol over mankind is unquestionably due to its power to stimulate the mystical faculties of human nature, usually crushed to earth by the cold facts and dry criticisms of the sober hour.
William James
2 Likes
Instead of explaining the sober facts of mechanics and electricity, I want to say a few words about the debt which we owe to youth; and with your permission I shall consider you as representing here not only the academic youth of Sweden nor even of Europe but also of America.
Felix Bloch
0 Likes
But I think once the word gets out that the movie is funny - funny is transcendent - it will traverse all demographic barriers if people embrace it as a funny movie.
Thomas Haden Church
0 Likes
I can honestly say, all the bad things that ever happened to me were directly, directly attributed to drugs and alcohol. I mean, I would never urinate at the Alamo at nine o'clock in the morning dressed in a woman's evening dress sober.
Ozzy Osbourne
6 Likes
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I can honestly say, all the bad things that ever happened to me were directly, directly attributed to drugs and alcohol. I mean, I would never urinate at the Alamo at nine o'clock in the morning dressed in a woman's evening dress sober.
Ozzy Osbourne
12 Likes
I can honestly say, all the bad things that ever happened to me were directly, directly attributed to drugs and alcohol. I mean, I would never urinate at the Alamo at nine o'clock in the morning dressed in a woman's evening dress sober.
Ozzy Osbourne
5 Likes
Vagina jokes aren't funny. Period.
Unknown
1251 Likes
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The fact that a believer is happier than a skeptic is no more to the point than the fact that a drunken man is happier than a sober one.
George Bernard Shaw
1 Likes
Humanity has advanced, when it has advanced, not because it has been sober, responsible, and cautious, but because it has been playful, rebellious, and immature.
Tom Robbins
3 Likes
Humanity quotes
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Humanity has advanced, when it has advanced, not because it has been sober, responsible, and cautious, but because it has been playful, rebellious, and immature.
Tom Robbins
5 Likes
Humanity quotes
Just take a chance let's see if we can make it 'til we're older. When I think about you I get love drunk so I'm never sober.
Yung Beazie
88 Likes
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No nation is drunken where wine is cheap; and none sober, where the dearness of wine substitutes ardent spirits as the common beverage. It is, in truth, the only antidote to the bane of whiskey.
Thomas Jefferson
12 Likes
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It's difficult to talk about, you know, my inadequacies, my inability to stay sober when I'm a relatively bright man and I've had a lot of great blessings and a lot of great opportunities.
Daniel Baldwin
0 Likes
Young men are apt to think themselves wise enough, as drunken men are apt to think themselves sober enough.
Lord Chesterfield
1 Likes
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College life too crazy. I feel like the only sober man in the world right now.
Unknown
13 Likes
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Affliction comes to us, not to make us sad but sober; not to make us sorry but wise.
Henry Ward Beecher
6 Likes
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All the mistakes I've ever made in my life have been when I've been drunk. I haven't made hardly any mistakes sober, ever, ever.
Tracey Emin
0 Likes
I know that some endeavor to throw the mantle of romance over the subject and treat woman like some ideal existence, not liable to the ills of life. Let those deal in fancy who have nothing better to deal in; we have to do with sober, sad realities, with stubborn facts.
Ernestine Rose
5 Likes
Writing is a job. A drunk writer is about as useful as a drunk surgeon. You can spend the rest of the day swimming in booze, but the hours you write should be sober and with purpose.
Steve Gilliard
2 Likes
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