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Funny Toilet Paper Puns Quotes & Sayings
Showing search results for "Funny Toilet Paper Puns" sorted by relevance. 500 matching entries found.
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QUOTES
The worst thing you can do is censor yourself as the pencil hits the paper. You must not edit until you get it all on paper. If you can put everything down, stream-of-consciousness, you'll do yourself a service.
Stephen Sondheim
0 Likes
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Gone on the road that I'm hardly home on the weekend. You be blowing my phone up tryin to see who I'm seeing but I'm chasing this paper so for this paper I'm reaching might f*ck one or two b*tches but don't consider it cheatin.
Wiz Khalifa
21 Likes
It's so gross when teachers lick their finger and then give the paper to me. I don't really want your dried coffee on my paper.
Unknown
89 Likes
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No publisher in America improved a paper so quickly on so grand a scale, took a paper that was marginal in qualities and brought it to excellence as Otis Chandler did.
David Halberstam
0 Likes
I wrapped my Christmas presents early this year, but I used the wrong paper. See, the paper I used said 'Happy Birthday' on it. I didn't want to waste it so I just wrote 'Jesus' on it.
Demetri Martin
6 Likes
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It's funny how a hello is always accompanied with a goodbye. It's funny how good memories can make you cry, it's funny how forever never seems to last, it's funny how much you would lose if you forgot about your past, it's funny how friends can just leave when you're down, it's funny how when you need someone they never are around, it's funny how people change and think they're so much better, it's funny how some many lies are packed into one love letter, it's funny how one night can hold so much regret, it's funny how you can forgive but not forget, it's funny how ironic life turns out to be, but the funniest part of all, is that none of that is funny to me.
Unknown
565 Likes
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He was the editor of our paper. He created the publishing house in Hebrew. He was - I wouldn't say the guru - but really he was our teacher and a most respected man. I wrote for the paper of the youth movement.
Shimon Peres
2 Likes
They were putting together a book for her birthday of all her friends, and they asked me to fill out a blank piece of paper and tell her how I felt. I couldn't do it because I have a hard time putting my thoughts on paper, because I'm not a put-it-down-on-paper person. I tell her in person all the time how much she means to me, and I e-mailed her and sent her a huge flower arrangement. Of all the types of shows she could have done, it's amazing that a Latino family show is what she wanted to do. If it was any other kind of show, we would have never met.
George Lopez
78 Likes
Rag paper, containing hemp fiber, is the highest quality and longest lasting paper ever made. It can be torn when wet, but returns to its full strength when dry.
Jack Herer
2 Likes
Funny, but after trading for more than 15 years, I still am capable of forgetting a cardinal rule: The paper you own, in the end, will be intertwined with the fate of the 30-year bond.
James Cramer
4 Likes
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What the world really needs is more love and less paper work.
Pearl Bailey
8 Likes
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What the world really needs is more love and less paper work .
Unknown
12 Likes
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I always start writing with a clean piece of paper and a dirty mind.
Patrick Dennis
85 Likes
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It won't make for a quiet life but it will make for an interesting paper vastly more significant because it is doing something only a daily paper can do.
Kingman Brewster Jr
1 Likes
At my age I do what Mark Twain did. I get my daily paper, look at the obituaries page and if I'm not there I carry on as usual.
Patrick Moore
13 Likes
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I don't want anything to do with anything mechanical between me and the paper, including a typewriter, and I don't even want a fountain pen between me and the paper.
Shelby Foote
3 Likes
You philosophers are lucky men. You write on paper and paper is patient. Unfortunate Empress that I am, I write on the susceptible skins of living beings.
Catherine The Great
19 Likes
who decided that paper beats rock? Have someone hold up a sheet of paper in front of their face, then throw a rock at it. Who wins?
Unknown
137 Likes
Witty Facebook Status quotes
People sort of take it for granted, but the more you see of the media world the more you appreciate a paper like the Times where its family continues to invest in editorial quality and I think it's the truly is the best paper in the world.
David Talbot
0 Likes
My grandfather was a newspaper publisher and his paper had all the comics in NYC, so some of my earliest memories are of reading the family paper and heading straight for the comics insert.
Rick Moody
1 Likes
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