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George Carlin Votearlin Vote Quotes & Sayings
Showing search results for "George Carlin Votearlin Vote" sorted by relevance. 500 matching entries found.
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QUOTES
Isnt it a bit unnerving that doctors call what they do 'practice?'
George Carlin
17 Likes
Medicine quotes
Doctors quotes
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Most people work just hard enough not to get fired and get paid just enough money not to quit.
George Carlin
20 Likes
Money quotes
Standing ovations have become far too commonplace. What we need are ovations where the audience members all punch and kick one another.
George Carlin
1 Likes
People are free to campaign and they will be free to vote. There won't be any soldiers, you know, at the queues. Anyone who has the right to vote is free to go and cast his vote anywhere in his own area, in his own constituency.
Robert Mugabe
15 Likes
Why is there so much controversy about drug testing? I know plenty of guys who would be willing to test any drug they could come up with
George Carlin
2 Likes
Drugs quotes
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When you're born you get a ticket to the freak show. When you're born in America, you get a front row seat.
George Carlin
6 Likes
Dusting is a good example of the futility of trying to put things right. As soon as you dust, the fact of your next dusting has already been established.
George Carlin
3 Likes
Instead of warning pregnant women not to drink, I think female alcoholics should be told not to fu...
George Carlin
76 Likes
Women quotes
Have you ever noticed that anybody driving slower than you is an idiot, and anyone going faster than you is a maniac?
George Carlin
67 Likes
Humorfunny quotes
Driving quotes
Why is there so much controversy about drug testing? I know plenty of guys who would be willing to test any drug they could come up with
George Carlin
12 Likes
Funny quotes
Drugs quotes
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The Religious Right dislikes both abortions and homos..uality. But who has fewer abortions than gays?
George Carlin
40 Likes
Funny Gay quotes
The more syllables a euphemism has, the further divorced from reality it is
George Carlin
8 Likes
Euphemism quotes
I have as much authority as the Pope, I just don't have as many people who believe it.
George Carlin
5 Likes
Authority quotes
Most people with low self-esteem have earned it
George Carlin
6 Likes
Self-esteem quotes
Electricity is really just organized lightning.
George Carlin
28 Likes
Funny quotes
Electricity quotes
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Of the fellows least likely to be president, you'd have to vote Jack No. 1.
George Smathers
0 Likes
Little-known fact: When the stock exchange closes, the guy who comes out on the balcony with that big hammer slams it on the head of the person who lost the most money that day
George Carlin
2 Likes
Trade quotes
At a formal dinner party, the person nearest death should always be seated closest to the bathroom.
George Carlin
6 Likes
Death quotes
I'm completely in favor of the separation of Church and State. My idea is that these two institutions screw us up enough on their own, so both of them together is certain death.
George Carlin
3 Likes
Death quotes
Death is caused by swallowing small amounts of saliva over a long period of time.
George Carlin
16 Likes
Death quotes
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