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Get Well After Knee Surgery Joke Quotes & Sayings
Showing search results for "Get Well After Knee Surgery Joke" sorted by relevance. 500 matching entries found.
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QUOTES
I'm going to go ahead and assume that setting me up with your highly undatable friend was your attempt at an April Fool's joke.
Unknown
12 Likes
April Fools Day quotes
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My life has been one great big joke, a dance that's walked a song that's spoke, I laugh so hard I almost choke when I think about myself.
Maya Angelou
73 Likes
Life quotes
Sorry your unhealthy lifestyle makes cardiac arrest a feasible outcome from an April Fool's joke.
Unknown
92 Likes
April Fools Day quotes
I have done things politically, and I've been running a business at the same time, but I sort of joke that to some extent I do more than most legislators have done in their whole careers, and I've been doing it as a part-time job.
Craig Benson
2 Likes
The joke I wanted to put into one of the promos for this new season, was to have a guy come up to me and say, Hey! Tony! I love your show, I've watched you every night since you started! And then I'd say, Ah! You're the one!
Tony Danza
6 Likes
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Those prizes in Cracker Jacks are a joke. I once got a magnifying glass. It was so poorly made, ants were laughing at it.
Scott Roeben
61 Likes
Funny quotes
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Be not affronted at a joke. If one throw salt at thee, thou wilt receive no harm, unless thou art raw.
Oliver Goldsmith
3 Likes
Jokes quotes
If a condescending joke is truly funny, make yourself the subject- you will increase the number of people laughing by at least one.
Joe Harsel
35 Likes
Encouragement quotes
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As a joke, I would love to stand in line at ATM machines, and when people put in their PIN, I yell Got it! and then run away.
Hussein Nishah
75 Likes
Funny quotes
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Humor quotes
What I said about Pistons fans during halftime was a joke, nothing more. If I offended anyone, I'm sorry. Clearly, over the past 10 years, we in L.A. have taken a commanding lead in post-game riots. If the Lakers win, I plan to overturn my own car.
Jimmy Kimmel
0 Likes
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What keeps me grounded is my friends and family and being able to joke around and have a sense of humor. They laugh at me about everything and I give it right back. Being able to have the sanctity of people you know and love and trust really makes you feel safe in this environment.
Leonardo DiCaprio
17 Likes
Ive tried Botox, but it scares me. Plastic surgery is really scary, but as long as you dont use these things to change your face, I think its okay. If I put on a few pounds, it goes straight to my butt. Im s..y but Im not intimidating. I do have cellulite. So much of your life you spend trying to prove yourself, trying to make things happen, trying to get somewhere else. But then you get in your late 30s and 40s and realize life is pretty amazing right in front of you if you can just be present in it.
Cindy Crawford
26 Likes
The surprising thing is that I was not funny in high school. I was always jealous of the funny kids because they always got the girls. I couldn't tell a joke to save my life.
Seann William Scott
11 Likes
I always thought security was a joke at New York airports, and in U.S. airports to begin with. You can go through any European or Middle Eastern airport and things are a lot tougher.
Richard Drew
31 Likes
I had my electricity turned off three times because I never had time to pay my bills. It was a joke. I'm making a ton of money, and I'm walking around my apartment with flashlights.
Sherry Stringfield
1 Likes
Electricity quotes
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I think Lady GaGa, as an artist you know, she's undeniable. That was one of them things where sometimes I get a joke in my head and I kinda want to share it with the world, you know what I'm saying. So it was just one of them things man, and it's, you know, it's all in fun, it's hip-hop.
Eminem
33 Likes
The moment you think of a joke is the best moment.
Judd Apatow
2 Likes
I think that every show on television has its place. I think Married With Children or, I don't know, The Nanny... some people want to go home, turn on the TV and be able to iron their clothes or grab a sandwich. Come out and catch a joke and not have to follow the story.
Peter Krause
0 Likes
Men reach their s..ual peak at eighteen. Women reach theirs at thirty-five. Do you get the feeling that God is playing a practical joke?
Rita Rudner
6 Likes
Marriage quotes
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I don't really know what is shocking. When you tell the story of a man who is beheaded, you have to show how they cut off his head. If you don't, it's like telling a dir.. joke and leaving out the punch line.
Roman Polanski
4 Likes
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