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Jack Handy Christmas Gift Quotes & Sayings
Showing search results for "Jack Handy Christmas Gift" sorted by relevance. 500 matching entries found.
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I will honor Christmas in my heart, and try to keep it all the year.
Charles Dickens
81 Likes
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The best of all gifts around any Christmas tree: the presence of a happy family all wrapped up in each other.
Burton Hillis
154 Likes
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Probably the earliest fly swatters were nothing more than some sort of striking surface attached to the end of a long stick.
Jack Handy
3 Likes
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The best gift that you can give baby Jesus this birthday is a caring heart! Merry Christmas to you and your loved ones!
Unknown
86 Likes
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The best gift you could give baby Jesus on his birthday is a clean heart. Wishing you a Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year that follows.
Unknown
31 Likes
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Blessed is the season which engages the whole world in a conspiracy of love!
Hamilton Wright Mabie
90 Likes
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The most beautiful gift in all this world becomes dim in our sight when placed beside the gift of love God gave us on Christmas night.
Unknown
2 Likes
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It's interesting to think that my ancestors used to live in the trees, like apes, until finally they got the nerve to head out onto the plains, where some were probably hit by cars
Jack Handy
5 Likes
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For centuries men have kept an appointment with Christmas. Christmas means fellowship, feasting, giving and receiving, a time of good cheer, home.
W J Tucker
52 Likes
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Christmas is not a time nor a season, but a state of mind. To cherish peace and goodwill, to be plenteous in mercy, is to have the real spirit of Christmas.
Calvin Coolidge
25 Likes
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The giving of gifts is not something man invented. God started the giving spree when he gave a gift beyond words, the unspeakable gift of His Son.
Robert Flatt
15 Likes
Spiritual Christmas quotes
Who can add to Christmas? The perfect motive is that God so loved the world. The perfect gift is that He gave His only Son. The only requirement is to believe in Him. The reward of faith is that you shall have everlasting life.
Corrie Ten Boom
21 Likes
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To me, boxing is like a ballet, except there's no music, no choreography, and the dancers hit each other
Jack Handy
15 Likes
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If I ever get real rich, I hope I'm not real mean to poor people, like now.
Jack Handy
8 Likes
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Dad always thought laughter was the best medicine, which I guess is why several of us died of tuberculosis.
Jack Handy
16 Likes
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I hope that after I die, people will say of me: That guy sure owed me a lot of money.
Jack Handy
11 Likes
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If I ever get real rich, I hope I'm not real mean to poor people, like I am now
Jack Handy
29 Likes
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I'd like to see a nude opera, because when they hit those high notes, I bet you can really see it in those genitals
Jack Handy
12 Likes
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I bet it was pretty hard to pick up girls if you had the Black Death.
Jack Handy
19 Likes
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I like to keep a bottle of stimulant handy in case I see a snake, which I also keep handy.
W C Fields
2 Likes
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