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Funny Put Toilet S Quotes & Sayings
Showing search results for "Funny Put Toilet S" sorted by relevance. 500 matching entries found.
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QUOTES
I wish the men in my house would be a little more courteous and put the toilet seat down.
Unknown
26 Likes
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Castro couldn't even go to the bathroom unless the Soviet Union put the nickel in the toilet.
Richard M Nixon
1 Likes
An engineer is someone who washes his hands before going to the toilet.
Anon
116 Likes
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s..y, no alcoholic, but she drink like a toilet. Told her do me a favor and put your mouth on this faucet.
Young Jeezy
13 Likes
I love my toilet. We've been through a lot of shit together.
Unknown
601 Likes
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May your summer be like a roll of toilet paper long and useful.
Unknown
27 Likes
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I wrote this on the shitter usin' toilet-paper. Put your head inside the water, enjoy the flavor.
Mac Miller
16 Likes
Pee splits into two streams. Both miss the toilet...
Unknown
50 Likes
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Whats the worst thing to do to a blind person? Leave the plunger in the toilet.
Unknown
327 Likes
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There is nothing as disgusting as the feeling you get the moment that your finger breaks through the toilet paper.
Unknown
305 Likes
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One of the scariest things ever is flushing a toilet & seeing the water coming up instead of going down.
Unknown
200 Likes
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The only parade I'll attend this Thanksgiving is the one to the toilet.
Unknown
15 Likes
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When you were a child, you dreamed of adventure, travel, and success. As an adult, a lot of the time, you just hope the toilet flushes. . .
Rick Sutter
35 Likes
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Life is like a roll of toilet paper. The closer you get to the end the faster it goes.
Unknown
434 Likes
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I only got a toilet seat cushion so my face would be comfortable after an intense night of drinking.
Unknown
45 Likes
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The last time I was in Spain I got through six Jeffrey Archer novels. I must remember to take enough toilet paper next time.
Bob Monkhouse
24 Likes
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Start the day off right...On the toilet...Shitting out yesterday's bullshit getting ready to digest today.
Marlon Wayans
65 Likes
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Life is a lot like toilet paper. You're either on a roll...or you're taking shit from some asshole.
Unknown
219 Likes
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Marriage is like a public toilet. Those waiting outside are desperate to get in & those inside are desperate to come out...
Unknown
79 Likes
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My nervous breakdown last season, when I was bemoaning the fact that I'll never have time to read all the great books I wanted to read. I was having a freak out. And Charlie said 'Well, if you put a few by the toilet and read one every couple of weeks you'll knock a bunch off.' And I said, 'There's not enough bowel movements left.'
Jon Cryer
0 Likes
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