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New Facebook Statuses Quotes & Sayings
Showing search results for "New Facebook Statuses" sorted by relevance. 500 matching entries found.
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Some people should consider having multiple Facebook accounts to go along with their multiple personalities.
Unknown
796 Likes
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It's a recipe for disaster when your country has an obesity epidemic and a skinny jean fad.
Unknown
842 Likes
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Spent the entire night trying to create a website for women drivers, but it kept crashing.
Unknown
696 Likes
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Some people should consider having multiple Facebook accounts to go along with their multiple personalities.
Unknown
737 Likes
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Don't be posting nothing up on my wall, stay off my Facebook. And don't be tagging me in nothin' at all, stay off my Facebook.
Wax
10 Likes
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If you don't have a crazy facebook friend, you are the crazy facebook friend.
Jimmy Kimmel
91 Likes
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That awkward moment when the same person you deleted off Facebook tries to add you again.
Unknown
192 Likes
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My 'check engine' light came on while driving to work this morning. I looked and the engine is still there.
Unknown
546 Likes
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Facebook's timeline is my favorite way to watch girls from high school get fat.
Unknown
723 Likes
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WELCOME TO FACEBOOK; The place where people add you as a friend & walk past you in the street. Where relationships are perfect, affairs are started, & liars believe they are telling the truth. Your enemies visit your profile the most, yet your friends & family block you, & even though you write what you are really thinking, someone always takes it the wrong way, & people think your status is about them.
Unknown
424 Likes
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I'm not addicted to facebook! You know, I just use it whenever I have time. Lunch time, break time, bed time, off time, that time, this time, any time, all the time!
Unknown
680 Likes
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Who needs television when you have so much drama on Facebook.
Unknown
517 Likes
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I wish I can delete you from my mind as easy as deleting you from Facebook.
Unknown
114 Likes
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Facebook should make it to where it says, 'Went from being in a relationship' to 'Problem solved.'
Unknown
368 Likes
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When I'm stalking my exes on Facebook, sometimes I think, 'I should have never let her go.'...but most times I think, 'She really let herself go.'
Rudy Espinoza
73 Likes
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Hopefully one day your life will be as cool as you make it appear on Facebook.
Unknown
595 Likes
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I secretly like days when none of my Facebook friends have birthdays.
Unknown
38 Likes
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Before Facebook, I had told maybe six people Happy Birthday, ever.
Unknown
584 Likes
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I want a real relationship; not a facebook one
Unknown
2736 Likes
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Choose your Facebook profile pic carefully. It'll be the one they use when you go missing.
Unknown
393 Likes
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