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Annoying Jokes Quotes & Sayings
Showing search results for "Annoying Jokes" sorted by relevance. 500 matching entries found.
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QUOTES
Children always know when company is in the living room - they can hear their mother laughing at their father's jokes
Unknown
73 Likes
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Yeah, I know I'm ugly...I said to a bartender, 'Make me a zombie.' He said 'God beat me to it.'
Rodney Dangerfield
28 Likes
Funny quotes
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Zac Efron is like a brother who's just goofy and crazy. He plays a lot of practical jokes.
Ashley Tisdale
30 Likes
My apartment was robbed and everything was replaced with exact replicas...I told my roommate and he said 'Do I know you?'
Steven Wright
72 Likes
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The roses have wilted, The violets are dead, Sugar is lumpy And so is your head.
Unknown
112 Likes
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My neighbour asked if he could use my lawnmower and I told him of course he could, so long as he didn't take it out of my garden.
Eric Morecambe
44 Likes
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I thought that he was taking shots at me, when it was just jokes. It was a misunderstanding, a mis-communication ... I'm about making money.
Soulja Boy
5 Likes
I went to a bookstore and asked the saleswoman where the Self Help section was. She said if she told me it would defeat the purpose.
Dennis Miller
44 Likes
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I had a dream that I was drowning in orange soda. Turned out it was just a Fanta sea.
Unknown
93 Likes
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Robert Pattinson must be the only guy in the world who enjoys his girlfriend being on her period.
Unknown
75 Likes
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The only thing we care about is gettin' girls & going to the gym.
Jersey Shore
37 Likes
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I once made love to a female clown, and she twisted my pe..s into a poodle.
Dan Whitney
109 Likes
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The ideal women does exist, but she is always married to another man.
Unknown
102 Likes
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My wife was fitted with a coil. For about 18 months I hated it! She used to pick up CB signals.
Bob Monkhouse
145 Likes
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I dream about a world where it is totally legal and socially acceptable to slap stupid people.
Unknown
205 Likes
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Family love is messy, clinging, and of an annoying and repetitive pattern, like bad wallpaper.
Friedrich Wilhelm Nietzsche
21 Likes
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And by 'K...' I mean 'fu.. you.'
Unknown
225 Likes
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I can't wait to be married. It's going to be so great to find that one special person I want to annoy for the rest of my life.
Ana Chable
165 Likes
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Ways to die: steal my food, touch me, look through my phone.
Unknown
145 Likes
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I remember, growing up, if something big, God forbid. happened, the first jokes you heard on the subject came out of Jersey.
Oscar Nunez
3 Likes
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