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Dwight Philips Quotes & Sayings
Showing search results for "Dwight Philips" sorted by relevance. 360 matching entries found.
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QUOTES
My jokes are in my head and I have a duplicate copy of my jokes in a lot of British comics' heads, where they are safe.
Emo Philips
6 Likes
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At my lemonade stand I used to give the first glass away free and charge five dollars for the second glass. The refill contained the antidote.
Emo Philips
6 Likes
Computers aren't intelligent, they only think they are
Emo Philips
2 Likes
Computers quotes
I was walking down fifth avenue today and I found a wallet, and I was gonna keep it, rather than return it, but I thought: well, if I lost a hundred and fifty dollars, how would I feel? And I realized I would want to be taught a lesson.
Emo Philips
12 Likes
New York's such a wonderful city. Although I was at the library today. The guys are very rude. I said, "I'd like a card." He says, "You have to prove you're a citizen of New York." So I stabbed him.
Emo Philips
16 Likes
Funny quotes
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Things are more like they are now than they ever were before.
Dwight D Eisenhower
1 Likes
You don't appreciate a lot of stuff in school until you get older. Little things like being spanked every day by a middle aged woman: Stuff you pay good money for in later life.
Emo Philips
85 Likes
Women quotes
You don't appreciate a lot of stuff in school until you get older. Little things like being spanked every day by a middle aged woman: Stuff you pay good money for in later life.
Emo Philips
57 Likes
Schools quotes
The sergeant is the Army.
Dwight D Eisenhower
0 Likes
We are going to have peace even if we have to fight for it.
Dwight D Eisenhower
3 Likes
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Leadership is the art of getting someone else to do something you want done because he wants to do it.
Dwight D Eisenhower
3 Likes
Plans are nothing; planning is everything.
Dwight D Eisenhower
0 Likes
I dont believe you, continue.
Dwight Schrute
3 Likes
War settles nothing.
Dwight D Eisenhower
6 Likes
I am faster than 80% of all snakes.
Dwight Schrute
3 Likes
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I have had more trouble with myself than with any other man.
Dwight L Moody
0 Likes
How far you can go without destroying from within what you are trying to defend from without?
Dwight D Eisenhower
0 Likes
I know the Bible is inspired because it inspires me.
Dwight L Moody
1 Likes
Only Americans can hurt America.
Dwight D Eisenhower
1 Likes
Pessimism never won any battle.
Dwight D Eisenhower
1 Likes
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