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Erma Bombeck Mothers Quotes & Sayings
Showing search results for "Erma Bombeck Mothers" sorted by relevance. 500 matching entries found.
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QUOTES
In general my children refuse to eat anything that hasn't danced on television.
Erma Bombeck
3 Likes
Television quotes
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There's something wrong with a mother who washes out a measuring cup with soap and water after she's only measured water in it.
Erma Bombeck
3 Likes
If a man watches three football games in a row, he should be declared legally dead.
Erma Bombeck
17 Likes
Football quotes
Mother's words of wisdom: Answer me! Don't talk with food in your mouth!
Erma Bombeck
8 Likes
Wisdom quotes
Someone once threw me a small, brown, hairy kiwi fruit, and I threw a wastebasket over it until it was dead.
Erma Bombeck
7 Likes
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Just think of all those women on the Titanic who said, No, thank you, to dessert that night. And for what!
Erma Bombeck
9 Likes
Women quotes
Some say our national pastime is baseball. Not me. It's gossip.
Erma Bombeck
3 Likes
Gossip quotes
Like religion, politics, and family planning, cereal is not a topic to be brought up in public. It's too controversial.
Erma Bombeck
17 Likes
Politics quotes
Housework is a treadmill from futility to oblivion with stop-offs at tedium and counter productivity.
Erma Bombeck
8 Likes
Housework quotes
I have a theory about the human mind. A brain is a lot like a computer. It will only take so many facts, and then it will go on overload and blow up.
Erma Bombeck
11 Likes
Mind quotes
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As a child, my number one best friend was the librarian in my grade school. I actually believed all those books belonged to her.
Erma Bombeck
15 Likes
Books quotes
One thing they never tell you about child raising is that for the rest of your life, at the drop of a hat, you are expected to know your child's name and how old he or she is.
Erma Bombeck
26 Likes
Knowledge quotes
When your mother asks, Do you want a piece of advice? it is a mere formality. It doesn't matter if you answer yes or no. You're going to get it anyway.
Erma Bombeck
25 Likes
Advice quotes
Youngsters of the age of two and three are endowed with extraordinary strength. They can lift a dog twice their own weight and dump him into the bathtub.
Erma Bombeck
7 Likes
Age quotes
Humor is a spontaneous, wonderful bit of an outburst that just comes. It's unbridled, it's unplanned, it's full of surprises.
Erma Bombeck
4 Likes
Humor quotes
Spontaneity quotes
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Never accept a drink from a urologist.
Erma Bombeck
1 Likes
Drink quotes
God created man, but I could do better.
Erma Bombeck
6 Likes
God quotes
Families aren't easy to join. They're like an exclusive country club where membership makes impossible demands and the dues for an outsider are exorbitant.
Erma Bombeck
24 Likes
Family Loyalty quotes
All of us have moments in out lives that test our courage. Taking children into a house with a white carpet is one of them.
Erma Bombeck
6 Likes
Courage quotes
Bravery quotes
Housekeeping quotes
When I stand before God at the end of my life, I would hope that I would not have a single bit of talent left, and could say, "I used everything you gave me.
Erma Bombeck
39 Likes
Action quotes
Talent quotes
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