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Facebook Statuses Ideas Quotes & Sayings
Showing search results for "Facebook Statuses Ideas" sorted by relevance. 500 matching entries found.
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I bet the NSA stopped monitoring your phone records after seeing they were all drunk dials to exes at 4 a.m.
Unknown
44 Likes
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If you've got a problem with me, tell me. Don't go putting it around on Facebook and then expect me to know that you're mad at me.
Unknown
423 Likes
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My doctor told me not to lift anything heavy for a few weeks. So now I have to sit down when I pee.
Unknown
664 Likes
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I wonder if Buzz and Woody ever met some of Andy's mom's toys. Especially since they probably have the same names...
Unknown
524 Likes
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If your girlfriend complains that you never take her anywhere expensive...take her to the gas station.
Seth Rogen
570 Likes
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I never get jealous when I see my ex with someone else, because my parents always taught me to give my used toys to the less fortunate.
Unknown
3730 Likes
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Don't ever forget the 'L' if you ever Google, 'Grandfather Clock.'
Unknown
521 Likes
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The ability to convert ideas to things is the secret of outward success.
Henry Ward Beecher
5 Likes
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No matter what anybody tells you, words and ideas can change the world.
Ash Sweeney
16 Likes
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Great dreams and ideas start from the mind and end outside as goals.
Jonah Takon
12 Likes
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Diarrhea is hereditary. It runs in your jeans...
Unknown
265 Likes
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Exams + Facebook = Your head is in the wrong book!
Azgraybebly Josland
558 Likes
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My ex boyfriends facebook status said 'Suicidal and standing on the edge.' ...So I poked him.
Unknown
1727 Likes
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We all have that one person we hate but constantly look at their facebook profile.
Unknown
38 Likes
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You posted a status on your friend's Facebook when he wasn't looking? Please tell me how great of a hacker you are.
Unknown
236 Likes
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The awkward moment when an ex-boyfriend tries to add you on Facebook. (After being previously deleted.)
Unknown
860 Likes
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If abortion is murder, then are condoms kidnapping...
Unknown
479 Likes
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If her job description on Facebook says, 'Model,' she's most likely unemployed...
Unknown
84 Likes
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Rewarding yourself with an hour on Facebook, just for writing your name on your homework.
Unknown
167 Likes
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There is so much drama on Facebook, I'm surprised that they don't have an reunion show!
Unknown
45 Likes
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