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Famous Song Stoner Quotes & Sayings
Showing search results for "Famous Song Stoner" sorted by relevance. 500 matching entries found.
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QUOTES
I was gonna go to work, but then I got high. I just got a new promotion, but I got high. Now I'm selling dope... and I know why.
Afroman
145 Likes
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I love weed, LOVE IT! Probably always will! But not as much as I love pus..! The end. -Thurgood Jenkins
Half Baked
226 Likes
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Now there are more overweight people in America than average-weight people. So overweight people are now averagewhich means, you have met your New Year's resolution.
Jay Leno
16 Likes
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I was gonna make love to you, but then I got high. I was gonna eat yo pu... too, but then I got high. Now I'm jacking off... and I know why.
Afroman
100 Likes
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I was gonna go to court, before I got high. I was gonna pay my child support, but then I got high. They took my whole paycheck... and I know why.
Afroman
69 Likes
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I wasn't gonna run from the cops, but I was high. I was gonna pull right over and stop, but I was high. Now I am a paraplegic... and I know why.
Afroman
59 Likes
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I was gonna pay my car note, until I got high. I wasn't gonna gamble on the boat, but then I got high. Now the tow truck is pulling away... and I know why.
Afroman
32 Likes
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If you ain't got a good job and you ain't smokin' weed, then I dont know what the fu.. you are doin' wit your life.
Katt Williams
924 Likes
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To him which smote great kings: for his mercy endureth for ever: And slew famous kings: for his mercy endureth for ever: Sihon king of the Amorites: for his mercy endureth for ever: And Og the king of Bashan: for his mercy endureth for ever: And gave their land for an heritage: for his mercy endureth for ever: Even an heritage unto Israel his servant: for his mercy endureth for ever.
Bible
2 Likes
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A friend with weed is a friend indeed.
Unknown
639 Likes
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I was gonna go to class, before I got high. I coulda cheated and I coulda passed, but I got high. I am taking it next semester... and I know why.
Afroman
125 Likes
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Some people go to high school... others go to school high.
Unknown
470 Likes
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Don't do drugs because if you do drugs you'll go to prison, and drugs are really expensive in prison.
John Hardwick
251 Likes
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PROBOSCIS, n. The rudimentary organ of an elephant which serves him in place of the knife-and-fork that Evolution has as yet denied him. For purposes of humor it is popularly called a trunk. Asked how he knew that an elephant was going on a journey, the illustrious Jo. Miller cast a reproachful look upon his tormentor, and answered, absently: When it is ajar, and threw himself from a high promontory into the sea. Thus perished in his pride the most famous humorist of antiquity, leaving to mankind a heritage of woe! No successor worthy of the title has appeared, though Mr. Edward bok, of _The Ladies' Home Journal_, is much respected for the purity and sweetness of his personal character.
Ambrose Bierce
32 Likes
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I was gonna clean my room, until I got high. I was gonna get up and find the broom, but then I got high. My room is still messed up... and I know why.
Afroman
106 Likes
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They lie about marijuana. Tell you pot-smoking makes you unmotivated. Lie! When you're high, you can do everything you normally do, just as well. You just realize that it's not worth the fu..ing effort. There is a difference.
Bill Hicks
505 Likes
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I know you don't smoke weed, I know this; but I'm gonna get you high today, 'cause it's Friday; you ain't got no job...and you ain't got sh*t to do. -Smokey
Friday
822 Likes
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At 4:20 p.m. on April 20 millions of pot smokers around the world will observe 420, otherwise known as Weed Day, to mark the marijuana movement.
Unknown
199 Likes
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Unknown
652 Likes
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Marijuana is not a drug!!! I used to suck d..k for coke! You ever suck d..k for marijuana?
Bob Saget
130 Likes
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