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Funny Joke Status Quotes & Sayings
Showing search results for "Funny Joke Status" sorted by relevance. 500 matching entries found.
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As I was filling up my gas tank I realized I didn't want to eat this week anyways.
Unknown
296 Likes
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I dont mind ketchup on my hot dog, as long as the bun is tight.
Jon Lajoie
412 Likes
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At least my job description doesn't involve repairing the economy or being the new head football coach at Penn State.
Unknown
35 Likes
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Somebody needs to start a restaurant called, 'Chick-Fil-Atheist' that's only open on Sunday.
Unknown
215 Likes
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You're so much better than A-Rod at concealing your drug use on the job.
Unknown
50 Likes
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Unless your name is GOOGLE...stop acting like you KNOW EVERYTHING...
Unknown
1570 Likes
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'Are you athletic?' Yes, I surf the Net.
Unknown
632 Likes
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Congratulations on buying a car that will go 0-60 in 5 seconds whether you want it to or not.
Unknown
56 Likes
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Its crazy because people expect you to be funny all the time and every day is not a funny day. I go to funerals and people are like 'tell a joke' and 'say one of your lines in a movie.' ITS A FUNERAL MAN!
Chris Tucker
34 Likes
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Facebook should have a limit on how many times a relationship status can be change ... after 3 times it should be change default to UNSTABLE!
Ronak Gurung
5225 Likes
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Scientist say that universe is made up of Electrons, Protons and Neutrons...They forgot to mention MORONS...
Unknown
396 Likes
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If each day is a gift, I would like to know where I can return Mondays.
Unknown
501 Likes
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Deja Vu is when God thinks something is so funny, that he has to rewind it to show it to his friends.
Unknown
509 Likes
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If I found out I only had a week to live, and could go anywhere in the world, I think I'd go to the hospital because that sounds serious.
Unknown
795 Likes
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I'll go to great lengths to scavenge other devices for batteries, before I will go out to buy new ones.
Unknown
362 Likes
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A rich man's joke is always funny.
Thomas Edward Brown
1 Likes
James Gandolfini's heart attack at age 51 has inspired me to get in better shape after I finish rewatching all six seasons of The Sopranos.
Unknown
81 Likes
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If a bra is called an 'Over the shoulder bolder holder,' then would you call men's underwear 'Under the butt nut hut?'
Unknown
486 Likes
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I can't tell if you have a better life than me, or better photo filters.
Unknown
98 Likes
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When girls hack a friends Facebook account: 'I love you b*tch!' When boys hack a friends Facebook account: 'I LOVE D*CK IN MY MOUTH!'
Unknown
843 Likes
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