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Funny Jokes To Post On Facebook Quotes & Sayings
Showing search results for "Funny Jokes To Post On Facebook" sorted by relevance. 500 matching entries found.
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I'm going to change my Facebook name to Benefits so when you add someone it'll say 'You are now friends with benefits!'
Unknown
639 Likes
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Dear Facebook friend suggestion, yeah I know him, but I fu..ing hate him.
Unknown
32 Likes
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Roses are red, Facebook is blue. Mutual friends are great, but who the f*ck are you?
Unknown
166 Likes
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Seeing an argument on Facebook, sitting there refreshing the page and thinking, 'Oh, this is going to be good!'
Unknown
122 Likes
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I dont like to reject anyone, I just pretend and if I see them and they go, 'Oh hey, I requested you on Facebook,' I say, 'Oh I never use Facebook, sorry.'
Andrew Garfield
21 Likes
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Facebook is 1) An obsession. 2) A distraction. 3) A tracking device. 4) Where drama lives. 5) Everybodys diary
Unknown
32 Likes
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New opinions often appear first as jokes and fancies, then as blasphemies and treason, then as questions open to discussion, and finally as established truths.
George Bernard Shaw
306 Likes
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Sometimes on Facebook, I feel like I'm just talking to a wall.
Unknown
203 Likes
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Ending a facebook conversation by liking the last comment that was posted.
Unknown
124 Likes
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Mom: I see that you're all dressed up, where are you going? Daughter: To the bathroom, I need a new Facebook picture.
Unknown
580 Likes
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Welcome to Facebook, where relationships are perfect, liars believe their own lies & the world shows off they are living a great life.
Unknown
88 Likes
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Facebook needs a button that's the equivalent of kicking someone under the table to stop them from making a fool of themselves.
Unknown
59 Likes
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Why is there a show called When animals attack? It should be called When stupid people go near dangerous animals.
Unknown
2524 Likes
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Christmas gift shopping is cancelled due to the world ending Dec 23.
Unknown
107 Likes
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That awkward moment during a test and you don't know any of the answers, so you just start laughing because you know you're screwed.
Unknown
1123 Likes
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It's funny how a hello is always accompanied with a goodbye. It's funny how good memories can make you cry, it's funny how forever never seems to last, it's funny how much you would lose if you forgot about your past, it's funny how friends can just leave when you're down, it's funny how when you need someone they never are around, it's funny how people change and think they're so much better, it's funny how some many lies are packed into one love letter, it's funny how one night can hold so much regret, it's funny how you can forgive but not forget, it's funny how ironic life turns out to be, but the funniest part of all, is that none of that is funny to me.
Unknown
565 Likes
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Don't do drugs kids. There's a time and place for everything. It's called college.
South Park
687 Likes
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I like my women like I like my weekend - short, filled with liquor and gone by Monday.
Unknown
393 Likes
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With my wife I don't get no respect. I made a toast on her birthday to 'the best woman a man ever had.' The waiter joined me.
Rodney Dangerfield
152 Likes
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Police arrested two kids yesterday, one was drinking battery acid, the other was eating fireworks. They charged one and let the other one off.
Tommy Cooper
44 Likes
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