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Happy New Years Funny Quotes & Sayings
Showing search results for "Happy New Years Funny" sorted by relevance. 500 matching entries found.
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Don't forget the past, learn from it. Happy New Year.
Unknown
35 Likes
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I wish you a very Happy New Year. Hope you have a great time ahead.
Unknown
18 Likes
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I was gonna go to work, but then I got high. I just got a new promotion, but I got high. Now I'm selling dope... and I know why.
Afroman
145 Likes
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Valentine's day has gotten blown way out of proportion. Valentine's Day just used to be for your girlfriend or your wife but now everyone's like 'Oh, happy valentine's day!' I even got a Valentine's Day card from my grandmother. How ridiculous is that? We stopped having s.. years ago!
Greg Giraldo
96 Likes
Funny quotes
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Happy Mother's Day to someone whose maternity clothes were much less embarrassing than Kim Kardashian's are.
Unknown
13 Likes
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Happy Mother's Day to the greatest mom in the world besides Michelle Obama.
Unknown
22 Likes
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Happy Mother's Day to a mom who didn't intentionally get knocked up to be on MTV.
Unknown
23 Likes
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Happy Mother's Day to a woman who thankfully will never be a candidate for the show Monster In-Laws.
Unknown
36 Likes
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Here's wishing a Happy Birthday to the most charming, funny, attractive and rocking personality in town. Have a great day.
Unknown
2749 Likes
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Happy Mother's Day to someone smart enough to avoid motherhood.
Unknown
23 Likes
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Every end is just a new beginning. Keep your spirits and determination unshaken and you shall always walk the glory road. With courage, faith and efforts you shall conquer everything you desire. I wish you a very happy new year.
Unknown
28 Likes
New Years Greetings quotes
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It doesn't matter if we haven't seen each other since years, months or days. What is important is that you have made an impression in my heart and you will always remain there! Happy Birthday and have a great year ahead.
Unknown
954 Likes
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Happy Mother's Day to someone whom I'm even more dependent on now than when I was in utero.
Unknown
8 Likes
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I was gonna go to court, before I got high. I was gonna pay my child support, but then I got high. They took my whole paycheck... and I know why.
Afroman
69 Likes
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I was gonna make love to you, but then I got high. I was gonna eat yo pu... too, but then I got high. Now I'm jacking off... and I know why.
Afroman
100 Likes
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I wasn't gonna run from the cops, but I was high. I was gonna pull right over and stop, but I was high. Now I am a paraplegic... and I know why.
Afroman
59 Likes
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I will stop peeping into my boyfriend's female friends profile on facebook.
Unknown
20 Likes
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If my boss knew how unproductive I am on Fridays, he wouldn't want me here either.
Unknown
178 Likes
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'Age' is the acceptance of a term of years. But maturity is the glory of years.
Martha Graham
5 Likes
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I was gonna pay my car note, until I got high. I wasn't gonna gamble on the boat, but then I got high. Now the tow truck is pulling away... and I know why.
Afroman
32 Likes
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