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Realist Dude I Know Quotes & Sayings
Showing search results for "Realist Dude I Know" sorted by relevance. 263 matching entries found.
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QUOTES
More often than not, I get accused of stuff that I just wasn't in, and when I tell them that I wasn't in it, they don't believe me. They just go, 'Dude, you were in that Rogaine ad,' and I say, 'No, I'm an actor, but I wasn't in that commercial.' Then they're like, 'Yes you were, man! What a jerk! Why are you being such a jerk? Let's kick this guy's ass!' So it's good I run fast.
Seth Green
2 Likes
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Now the buds on the stems are like trees in an orchid. Anybody in the room who don't smoke weed is gettin' torch lit. By the smoke ni...s, choke ni...s, cough and they fart. Need to quit it but they still tryin' to hit it too hard.
Devin Tha Dude
28 Likes
I've been so candid in the past, and it's burned me. I used to speak without a filter, but I end up in hot water. I barely remember those years. I was taking prescription medication; I was a drugstore cowboy, mixing this with this, seeing what the combinations did. I couldn't picture myself in two years. People would ask, 'What are you going to do in the next record?' And I'd say, 'Dude, I can't even see myself being alive.'
Pete Wentz
3 Likes
Ive been in relationships from the age of 14 and now Im single. I said to a friend the other day, Dude, Im doing a show with dancers. Ive got to be single. He was like, Dont sleep with anyone in your show. Thats a mistake. Its good advice. But Im not sure Ill stick to it.
Daniel Radcliffe
8 Likes
I never believed in Santa Claus because I knew no white dude would come into my neighborhood after dark.
Unknown
137 Likes
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I might have tried bungee jumping, until I saw that video of that guy whose cord came untied. He didn't know it 'till he hit the ground. Oh, he flew off that tower, hollering at his buddies. 'Whoo, check me out, dudes! Oh, that ground is coming up...' WHAM! And what do you say, if you're the operator of that ride, to the next guy in line? 'All right dude, you're up.'
Bill Engvall
8 Likes
There would be a lot of really nice people saying a lot of nice things. But then I get to the one person who would say, His eyebrows look big. He ought to shave his eyebrows. He looks like a freaking Neanderthal. I thought, Thats so mean. I cant help my eyebrows, dude.
Andrew Garfield
3 Likes
When I first went for a meeting with my management company, the guy in charge of the place, David Prince, said that it didn't really portray who I was. I agreed. It sounded too much like an angry a.. dude who just did a 15 year bid upstate and wants to kill everyone. So me and my boys just kept thinking of names, till we came up with Chris Webby. It's not really a stage name as much as it's just who I am.
Chris Webby
38 Likes
Dude! I dont have a problem with you, you know that, its like I love ya, weve been best friends since we were kids, its like I dont have a problem with Lauren either, so Im not just going to go around hating Lauren just cuz you hate Lauren.
Brody Jenner
2 Likes
Snatch fishing is the shit, its illegal but its so fu..ing fun. Heres what it is: its a three prong hook with a weight in the middle, and what you do is, say you go to a dock and see a fish chillin. Drop your hook under him and yank as hard as you can! Dude, its so fu..ing fun! You get him on shore and stomp his ass!
Gym Class Heroes
6 Likes
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My son is 12 now, and is really getting into girls. A lot. But the thing about twelve year old boys is that they don't possess what I like to call that...discretionary gene yet. We were walking home from the ballfield the other day and there was a woman walking towards us who was...gifted. I saw them, and I saw him see them. But she was too close for me to go, 'Dude, shut up.' She hadn't walked two feet behind us and he goes 'God dang, did you see the SIZE of those things?' And all I could say was 'Yeah, I did!'
Bill Engvall
13 Likes
I've heard a lot of really awful, negative things said about Pete, and it's like, Dude, you don't even have a clue how honest and real that guy is for the amount of crap that people talk about him. Pete said it, and it's true, they make you into a wrestling character. And it's also like reality TV editing. It's really easy to cut somebody in rolling their eyes when that might not have even happened next to the thing that it's being shown next to.
Patrick Stump
5 Likes
We wanted to do an early 90's R&B song. I think it was Jorma who said, 'What about giving a gift where you take the top off and your d..k is through a hole?' I came up with an idea of the melody. Once we started recording, Justin took the reins and schooled us and made it a much better song. The dude is a hit maker; that's what he does. Color Me Badd has been brought up more as an inspiration because we're white. But we're drawing a lot on Jodeci and R. Kelly.
Andy Samberg
3 Likes
Dude, Ted is a fu..ing murderer! I can't fu.. with him! I got a wife, man! She's gonna be out of jail soon. I wanna fu.. her! I wanna have s.. with her! I am not gonna wake up murdered tomorrow. -Ted
Pineapple Express
10 Likes
Wayne has always been my biggest influence. It's weird because I sit down and talk to Wayne like he's just a regular human being, and then I walk on stage with him and there's 20,000 people screaming for him. I think it puts it into perspective for me like, Wait a minute, this is actually attainable. I could have this; I just need to focus and remember that my grind is just beginning. I always say that that's what I learned from Wayne the most; he never stops grinding. It showed me, Yo, this dude is the truth, and I'm going to follow in his footsteps.
Nicki Minaj
142 Likes
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Wayne has always been my biggest influence. It's weird because I sit down and talk to Wayne like he's just a regular human being, and then I walk on stage with him and there's 20,000 people screaming for him. I think it puts it into perspective for me like, Wait a minute, this is actually attainable. I could have this; I just need to focus and remember that my grind is just beginning. I always say that that's what I learned from Wayne the most; he never stops grinding. It showed me, Yo, this dude is the truth, and I'm going to follow in his footsteps.
Nicki Minaj
7 Likes
I think at the end of the day, the show was huge and we all faced the task of having to show people that we can play other characters. It's what it would have been whether I was there for three years or ten. The only difference is because I was there for ten years, I made more money. Dude, by the end I was like, 'Hell yeah I'll do season ten, I'm finally
Brian Austin Green
3 Likes
Being single has changed drastically with my age. A lot of things are different. Especially being single now. Because when I used to go out in the old days I was the cool dude in the club with the glasses on in the corner. You can't do that when you're 49. You got your glasses on in the corner and you look creepy. A lot has changed.
Eddie Murphy
21 Likes
Dinosaur fossils? God put those there to test our faith." Thank God I'm strapped in right now here man. I think God put you here to test my faith, Dude. You believe that? "Uh huh." Does that trouble anyone here? The idea that God.. might be...fu..in' with our heads? I have trouble sleeping with that knowledge. Some prankster God running around: "Hu hu ho. We will see who believes in me now, ha HA.
Bill Hicks
35 Likes
Comedy quotes
My son I worry about. I'm pretty sure he's gonna be gay. At this point I'm just hoping he's not a bottom. Sorry to sound closed-minded and uptight, but let's face it, no dad wants his son to be gay. Not only do you get no grandkids, but I'm sure high school is no picnic for a fifteen-year-old gay boy. On the other hand, maybe I'm just viewing this through the bifocals of an old heteros..ual dude. The way things are going, my son will probably get his a.. kicked for not being gay. 'Carolla thinks he's too good to suck cock. Come on boys, lets get him.
Adam Carolla
17 Likes
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