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Santa Adult Jokes Quotes & Sayings
Showing search results for "Santa Adult Jokes" sorted by relevance. 500 matching entries found.
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QUOTES
The 3 stages of man: He believes in Santa Claus. He doesn't believe in Santa Claus. He is Santa Claus.
Rick Sutter
77 Likes
Christmas quotes
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Mythology quotes
Getting Old quotes
Funny quotes
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Dear Santa.... you'se a bi... ni...... nonono... wait wait... Dear Santa... You'se a bi... a.. ni......i heard the mall was hiring extra security to protect you.. that's a bi... move santa...i'm comin for that a.. again... until you pay what you owe! sincurly yours... the santa stalker...
Riley Freeman
60 Likes
There are three stages of man: he believes in Santa Claus; he does not believe in Santa Claus; he is Santa Claus
Bob Phillips
6 Likes
Fun Christmas quotes
One time I asked Brasky to dress up as Santa for a Christmas party I was having for my children. Anyway, Brasky shows up as Santa, says I've got goodies for you kids. He reaches into his bag and proceeds to hand out scrap metal and cigarettes to them. Then he takes off his beard and says There's no Santa cause I ate him!
Bill Brasky
0 Likes
Here comes Santa Claus! Here comes Santa Claus! Right down Santa Claus Lane!
Unknown
4 Likes
Christmas Song quotes
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I believed in Santa Claus until I was much older than the average kid. One year, my mom wrote 'Merry Christmas, Stacy' on a chalkboard and told me it was written by Santa. I was like, 'Oh my God, he knows my name!' I truly believed. Then a kid ruined it for me one day and told me there was no Santa, and I came home crying. The sad part was that the girl who told me was younger than I was.
Stacy Keibler
6 Likes
I saw mommy kissing Santa Claus. Underneath the mistletoe last night. She didn't see me creep down the stairs to have a peep; She thought that I was tucked up in my bedroom fast asleep. Then, I saw mommy tickle Santa Claus Underneath his beard so snowy white; Oh, what a laugh it would have been. If daddy had only seen. mommy kissing Santa Claus, last night.
Unknown
10 Likes
Christmas Song quotes
I stopped believing in Santa Claus when my mother took me to see him in a department store, and he asked for my autograph.
Shirley Temple
32 Likes
Funny quotes
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ni..., I'm Santa Claus; where the fu.. the milk and cookies?
Santa Claus
49 Likes
Friday After Next quotes
Jokes are better than war. Even the most aggressive jokes are better than the least aggressive wars. Even the longest jokes are better than the shortest wars.
George Mikes
11 Likes
Jokes quotes
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If being an adult means eating cereal for every meal except breakfast then, yes, I'm an adult.
Unknown
1 Likes
Forty is the line of demarcation that says you're an adult now. You're an adult, so don't pretend you're a kid anymore.
Paul Feig
0 Likes
It wasn't until I became more confident with myself and I put myself forward instead of the jokes; at first it was put the jokes out there and I'm just behind the jokes.
Wanda Sykes
0 Likes
People always tell me, 'Don't work so much', but I can't help it. I feel like all the things I've done are important to get to this adult stage and now I'm getting all these adult offers, so it's working.
Kirsten Dunst
0 Likes
When a child hits a child, we call it aggression. When a child hits an adult, we call it hostility. When an adult hits an adult, we call it assault. When an adult hits a child, we call it discipline.
Haim G Ginott
46 Likes
Aggressive quotes
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Texas, to be respected must be polite. Santa Anna living, can be of incalculable benefit to Texas; Santa Anna dead, would just be another dead Mexican.
Sam Houston
34 Likes
Jokes are better than war. Even the most aggressive jokes are better than the least aggressive wars. Even the longest jokes are better than the shortest wars.
George Mikes
1 Likes
I put myself in this position, an adult position, so I have to be an adult and take responsibility for what I did. I've really become at peace with the whole situation.
Jamie Lynn Spears
1 Likes
As far I'm concerned, being an adult is way more fun than being a kid. But then I was a kid who wanted to be an adult. I'd watch shows like 'Bewitched' and see Darren come home and mix a martini and I'd go, 'That looks awesome! I want to do that!'
Paul Feig
8 Likes
The best ideas come as jokes. Make your thinking as funny as possible.
David Ogilvy
40 Likes
Jokes quotes
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