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Short And Funny Instagram Bios Quotes & Sayings
Showing search results for "Short And Funny Instagram Bios" sorted by relevance. 500 matching entries found.
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It's funny how a hello is always accompanied with a goodbye. It's funny how good memories can make you cry, it's funny how forever never seems to last, it's funny how much you would lose if you forgot about your past, it's funny how friends can just leave when you're down, it's funny how when you need someone they never are around, it's funny how people change and think they're so much better, it's funny how some many lies are packed into one love letter, it's funny how one night can hold so much regret, it's funny how you can forgive but not forget, it's funny how ironic life turns out to be, but the funniest part of all, is that none of that is funny to me.
Unknown
565 Likes
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I like my women like I like my weekend - short, filled with liquor and gone by Monday.
Unknown
393 Likes
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The main reason Santa is so jolly is because he knows where all the bad girls live.
George Carlin
85 Likes
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Santa Claus has the right idea. Visit people once a year.
Victor Borge
25 Likes
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Since today is Valentine's day, I was wondering if you'd like to go back to MySpace, so I can Twitter with your Yahoo, until I Google all over your Facebook and we can Instagram our date... ;) Happy Valentine's Day, Everyone!!
Unknown
495 Likes
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I'm not overweight. I'm just nine inches too short.
Shelley Winters
26 Likes
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What do you call a blind German? A not see!
Unknown
133 Likes
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Christmas is a time when you get homesick...even when you're home.
Carol Nelson
103 Likes
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What do you call a fake noodle??? An impasta.
Unknown
172 Likes
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What do you call identical boobs? Identitties.
Unknown
110 Likes
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Want to hear the joke about the vacuum? Nevermind...It sucks.
Unknown
204 Likes
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I'm positive I lost an electron, I better keep an ion that.
Unknown
144 Likes
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A blind man walks into a bar...and a table...and a chair.
Unknown
135 Likes
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I just made Romney noodles Obama self.
Unknown
123 Likes
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I just tripped over my sister's bras. I guess it was a booby trap.
Unknown
155 Likes
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I went to a meeting for premature ejaculators. I left early.
Jack Benny
303 Likes
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Wanna hear a joke about my pe..s? Never mind, it's too long.
Unknown
3462 Likes
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What do you call a computer that can sing? A dell.
Unknown
208 Likes
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I changed all my passwords to 'incorrect'. So my computer just tells me when I forget.
Unknown
2887 Likes
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No I didnt trip The floor looked like it needed a hug.
Unknown
2505 Likes
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