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Facebook Funny Weekend Sl Quotes & Sayings
Showing search results for "Facebook Funny Weekend Sl" sorted by relevance. 500 matching entries found.
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QUOTES
You have at least two addresses memorized; Your own address and P. Sherman 42 Wallaby Way, Sydney.
Unknown
553 Likes
Funny Facebook Status quotes
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Just a heads up that we aren't going into that war you heard about in between twerking videos.
Unknown
32 Likes
Funny Facebook Status quotes
Just saw two deaf girls arguing, one said, 'bi... better keep my name out your hands.'
Unknown
258 Likes
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No matter how old you are, when the ketchup bottle farts, it's funny.
Unknown
99 Likes
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Don't steal, don't lie, don't cheat, don't sell drugs. The government hates competition.
Hussein Nishah
526 Likes
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Oh, it's sunny outside. I better update my Facebook status for all of my friends that don't have windows.
Unknown
3329 Likes
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A drunken man was dreaming that he died and reincarnated on earth as a chicken. He became heavy and tried to lay an egg! He pushed and pushed and laid the 1st egg, then the 2nd. He was pushing to lay a 3rd egg when his wife screamed ''James! You're shitting on the bed!"
Unknown
604 Likes
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I lose all respect for myself when I bite my own tongue. I've been chewing for decades, how did I manage to f*ck that up?
Unknown
434 Likes
Funny Facebook Status quotes
Sometimes I walk through the baby aisle at the grocery store as a reminder to always use a condom.
Unknown
481 Likes
Funny Facebook Status quotes
I'm pretty sure the whole ladies first thing was created by a guy just to check out ass.
Unknown
2760 Likes
Funny Facebook Status quotes
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That awkward moment when people start stuff on your Facebook status and you just don't want to get involved.
Unknown
154 Likes
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I hate how spiders just sit there on the walls and act like they pay rent...
Unknown
459 Likes
Funny Facebook Status quotes
I changed all my passwords to 'incorrect'. So my computer just tells me when I forget.
Unknown
2887 Likes
Funny Facebook Status quotes
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Hi, I'm a shower. If you turn me on, I'll make you wet.
Mickey Anderson
230 Likes
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The closest that I've gotten to murder: Holding Oreos under the milk until the bubbles stop...
Unknown
576 Likes
Funny Facebook Status quotes
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I dream of a better tomorrow, where chickens can cross the road and not be questioned about their motives.
Unknown
1223 Likes
Funny Facebook Status quotes
I wonder who the first person was to see an egg come out of a chickens butt and think...'That looks tasty, I'm gonna eat that.'
Unknown
568 Likes
Funny Facebook Status quotes
I need breakfast! If I were any more hungry right now, Brad and Angelina would adopt me.
Unknown
176 Likes
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The thirst people have because they want a Valentine.
Unknown
256 Likes
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There's no worse feeling than that millisecond you're sure you are going to die after leaning your chair back a little too far.
Unknown
524 Likes
Funny Facebook Status quotes
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