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Funny Card To Mom Quotes & Sayings
Showing search results for "Funny Card To Mom" sorted by relevance. 500 matching entries found.
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I stopped believing in Santa Claus when my mother took me to see him in a department store, and he asked for my autograph.
Shirley Temple
44 Likes
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Santa Claus wears a Red Suit, He must be a communist. And a beard and long hair, Must be a pacifist. What's in that pipe that he's smoking?"
Arlo Guthrie
21 Likes
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Roses are reddish, Violets are bluish, If it werent for Christmas, Wed all be Jewish.
Benny Hill
92 Likes
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I never believed in Santa Claus because I knew no white dude would come into my neighborhood after dark.
Unknown
137 Likes
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Dear Santa, what I want for Christmas is... your list with names of naughty girls.
Unknown
693 Likes
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The main reason Santa is so jolly is because he knows where all the bad girls live.
George Carlin
85 Likes
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Santa Claus has the right idea. Visit people once a year.
Victor Borge
25 Likes
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What I don't like about office Christmas parties is looking for a job the next day.
Phyllis Diller
42 Likes
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When I first got into magic, it was an underground phenomenon. Now everybody's like pick a card, any card.
Sage Francis
2 Likes
I know its not Christmas, but Santa's lap is always ready.
Unknown
143 Likes
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On the 12th day of Christmas, my Facebook gave too me, 12 stupid bi...es, 11 fake people, 10 FB hackings, 9 new po.. websites, 8 wack statuses, 7 ho.. a slurping, 6 bums a posting, 5 ignorant bastards, 4 corny birds, 3 messages, 2 ugly friends, & a girl who smashed the wholeee team.
Unknown
560 Likes
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I once bought my kids a set of batteries for Christmas with a note on it saying, toys not included.
Bernard Manning
86 Likes
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You don't realize how much you use your credit card not even to buy things. It's a card you get so you can navigate society.
Adam Carolla
2 Likes
I don't get much sense of reward from having discovered how to get the Foo card to coexist with the Bar card.
Jamie Zawinski
0 Likes
When you stop believing in Santa Claus is when you start getting clothes for Christmas!
Hussein Nishah
270 Likes
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I wanted to send you something AMAZING for Christmas but the mailman told me to get out of the mailbox...
Unknown
146 Likes
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Anyone who believes that men are the equal of women has never seen a man trying to wrap a Christmas present.
Unknown
71 Likes
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I smile because you're my Mother. I laugh because there's nothing you can do about it. Happy Mom's Day!
Unknown
245 Likes
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MOM turned upside down spells WOW! Mom you were the best!
Rick Sutter
6 Likes
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Happy Mothers Day mom! You are an inspiration, a great friend and by far the best mom any one can ask for.
Unknown
295 Likes
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