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Funny Clever Status Quotes & Sayings
Showing search results for "Funny Clever Status" sorted by relevance. 500 matching entries found.
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QUOTES
If a bra is called an 'Over the shoulder bolder holder,' then would you call men's underwear 'Under the butt nut hut?'
Unknown
486 Likes
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Facebook needs a Drama of the day section in my news feed.
Unknown
501 Likes
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Being popular on Facebook is like sitting at the cool table in the cafeteria at a mental hospital.
Unknown
1468 Likes
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Deleting your Facebook is like running away from home. You're only doing it for attention and you'll be back in a day.
Unknown
1281 Likes
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Facebook is like a relationship: Faithful on your wall, but cheating in their inbox...
Unknown
1239 Likes
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Myspace is my ex husband, Facebook is my baby daddy, Twitter is my ho and I'm in a serious relationship with Instagram.
Ambri Bright
402 Likes
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Facebook is that insecure chick that keeps changing her hairstyle &/or color until she finally loses her mind and shaves it & scares everyone.
Unknown
520 Likes
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Going to church doesn't make you a Christian any more than standing in a garage makes you a car.
Unknown
1682 Likes
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Parents spend the first part of our lives teaching us to walk and talk, and the rest of it telling us to sit down and shut up.
Unknown
1536 Likes
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I wonder how some people can keep up with both their Tumblr, Twitter, Facebook...I cant even keep up with the Kardashians.
Unknown
313 Likes
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Does anyone have that light switch in their house that they really don't know what it goes to...
Unknown
947 Likes
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The real trouble with reality is that there's no background music.
Unknown
960 Likes
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Dance like the photos not being tagged. Love like you've never been unfriended. Sing like nobody's following. Share like you care. And do it all like it wont end up on Youtube!
Raymond Estrada
634 Likes
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When ever I get a headache I take two tablet of aspirin and keep away from children just like the bottle says.
Hussein Nishah
855 Likes
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Linkedin invitations are like herpes...They pop up from time to time to remind you they still exist and nobody wants them.
Unknown
117 Likes
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If Facebook ever shuts down. You'll see people roaming the streets shoving pictures in others faces screaming 'Do you like this!?!?!.. DO YOU!?!?!'
Unknown
1647 Likes
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If someone says expect the unexpected slap them in the face and say 'I bet you didn't expect that!'
Unknown
427 Likes
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The awkward moment, when Usain Bolt runs faster than your internet connection.
Unknown
293 Likes
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I like to put things back where I got them from when I am done using them...so I dropped your mom off at the bar.
Unknown
232 Likes
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Dont let your ears witness what your eyes didn't see...& don't let your mouth speak what your heart doesn't feel.
Unknown
1647 Likes
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