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Funny Flu Status Quotes & Sayings
Showing search results for "Funny Flu Status" sorted by relevance. 500 matching entries found.
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QUOTES
I love facebook because it helps me remember what I did the night before when I blacked out.
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398 Likes
Funny Facebook Status quotes
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Why am I the weird one for browsing through your pictures? You're the one who uploaded over a thousand pictures of yourself.
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763 Likes
Funny Facebook Status quotes
Roses are red, Facebook is blue, No mutual friends, Who the f*ck are you?
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1690 Likes
Funny Facebook Status quotes
Cop: Ma'am, what's in the bottle? Me: Just some water. Cop: Ma'am that's wine... Me: Jesus did it again!!
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511 Likes
Funny Facebook Status quotes
Gay people: One man's junk is another man's treasure.
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297 Likes
Funny Facebook Status quotes
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I wonder if tap dancers walk into a room, look at a floor and think, 'I'd so tap that.'
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730 Likes
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If my name was Mario I'd get into as many relationships as I can just so I could break up with them and say, 'It's not you, it's-a me! Mario.'
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298 Likes
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I hate it when I am singing a song and the artist gets the words wrong.
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331 Likes
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I hate people who steal my ideas, before I think of them.
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497 Likes
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Facebook is the only place where it's acceptable to talk to a wall.
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2882 Likes
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Ghetto Olympics: On your MARK.....Get SET........TWERK!
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306 Likes
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I hope the next ridiculously popular Facebook trend is shutting the fu.. up.
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188 Likes
Funny Facebook Status quotes
Being such a good cook that even the fire alarm cheers you on.
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437 Likes
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God loves me even when I don't forward those chain letters.
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2194 Likes
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Your iPhone 5 will be the perfect device to play with while you're waiting in line for the iPhone 5S.
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54 Likes
Funny Facebook Status quotes
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Just because the seasons are changing doesnt mean your bikini profile picture has to.
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119 Likes
Funny Facebook Status quotes
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Boobs: Proof that men can pay attention to two things at once.
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413 Likes
Funny Facebook Status quotes
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Wanna come over to MySpace and Twitter my Yahoo till I Google all over your Facebook?
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2433 Likes
Funny Facebook Status quotes
Pregnancy tests should read: You're Screwed! or Keep Screwing.
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455 Likes
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One of the scariest things ever is flushing a toilet & seeing the water coming up instead of going down.
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200 Likes
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