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Funny Lent Facebook Statusess Quotes & Sayings
Showing search results for "Funny Lent Facebook Statusess" sorted by relevance. 500 matching entries found.
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I saw a license plate yesterday that said "I Miss New York", so I smashed their window and stole their radio.
Unknown
649 Likes
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I stepped on a cornflake this morning...I'm a cereal killer now!
Unknown
294 Likes
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I just saved a whole bunch of money on my child support by switching to condoms.
Unknown
341 Likes
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Call me Spider-man because I'm in love with Mary Jane.
Unknown
235 Likes
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420 Facebook Status quotes
I think car horns should sound like gun shots....I bet you'll move then.
Unknown
168 Likes
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I wish our s.. life was as passionate as your reaction to the casting news about Fifty Shades of Grey.
Unknown
67 Likes
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Sorry the casting of Fifty Shades of Grey has caused you to completely revamp your mastur...... fantasies.
Unknown
63 Likes
Funny Facebook Status quotes
Friends are like bum cheeks, shit comes between them but they always stick together.
Unknown
332 Likes
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Online dating is now like eating at Denny's thanks to photoshop, in person your order looks nothing like the photo on the menu.
Unknown
306 Likes
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Does a prostitude file pregnancy as a work-related accident?
Unknown
645 Likes
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I hate when new parents ask who the baby looks like. It was born 15 minutes ago, it looks like a potato.
Unknown
588 Likes
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Our sincere condolences to the next woman Michael Douglas gives Catherine Zeta-Jones' HPV to.
Unknown
26 Likes
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I said I'd be there in 5 minutes. Quit calling me every half hour.
Nikhil Saluja
277 Likes
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I surveyed 100 women and asked them what shampoo they used when showering, 98 of them said: How the hell did you get in here?
Nikhil Saluja
208 Likes
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Never in my life have I seen a tombstone that read: Died for not forwarding that text to 10 people.
Unknown
475 Likes
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Dear Internet Users, Someday u will regret not reading me. Sincerely, Terms & Conditions.
Unknown
1055 Likes
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A friend of mine said onions are the only food that could make you cry. That was before I hit him in the face with a watermelon.
Unknown
585 Likes
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I'm not saying she's a slut but whenever she eats a banana in public, she puts one hand behind her head.
Unknown
297 Likes
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I shaved my commute time in half by changing my car's horn to sound like gunfire.
Unknown
705 Likes
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I get super paranoid whenever I walk into a store with something that they sell there...
Unknown
37 Likes
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