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Funny Tired Joke Quotes & Sayings
Showing search results for "Funny Tired Joke" sorted by relevance. 500 matching entries found.
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QUOTES
Tired of being single, tired of getting in a relationship and feeling single, tired of being loyal getting fu..ed over and END UP being single.
Unknown
17 Likes
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Im tired of broken promises. Im tired of my friends talking behind my back and Im tired of selfish people. So there for Im done forgiving.
Unknown
261 Likes
Selfish Friends quotes
Because Buffy really has become the straight man, every once in a while it's nice to be the one that tells the joke and it's nice to be the one that is the joke and it's nice to do something that's a little bit different.
Sarah Michelle Gellar
3 Likes
It's funny how a hello is always accompanied with a goodbye. It's funny how good memories can make you cry, it's funny how forever never seems to last, it's funny how much you would lose if you forgot about your past, it's funny how friends can just leave when you're down, it's funny how when you need someone they never are around, it's funny how people change and think they're so much better, it's funny how some many lies are packed into one love letter, it's funny how one night can hold so much regret, it's funny how you can forgive but not forget, it's funny how ironic life turns out to be, but the funniest part of all, is that none of that is funny to me.
Unknown
565 Likes
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Breaking News: There is still no cure for mornings.
Unknown
177 Likes
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If a condescending joke is truly funny, make yourself the subject- you will increase the number of people laughing by at least one.
Joe Harsel
35 Likes
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Those prizes in Cracker Jacks are a joke. I once got a magnifying glass. It was so poorly made, ants were laughing at it.
Scott Roeben
61 Likes
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As a joke, I would love to stand in line at ATM machines, and when people put in their PIN, I yell Got it! and then run away.
Hussein Nishah
75 Likes
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Every time you see a beautiful woman, just remember, somebody got tired of her
Ralph Waldo Emerson
64 Likes
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Men reach their s..ual peak at eighteen. Women reach theirs at thirty-five. Do you get the feeling that God is playing a practical joke?
Rita Rudner
6 Likes
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After you do a joke a few times, you have material that you know works. Although sometimes I have a joke that has worked a bunch of times and then one night it'll flop. And that's when I really take a hard look at myself and say: 'Well, that crowd is obviously wrong. That crowd has absolutely no idea what it's talking about.'
Aziz Ansari
2 Likes
I'm gonna sit alone in a quiet room and cry until I cant cry no more. I am tired of all the pain inside and I am tired of all the tears falling from my eyes.
Unknown
148 Likes
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Showbiz sucks...it's ridiculous, it's funny and it's all a joke. There are more interesting things to talk about than my hair colour, who I am dating or how short my skirt is. Millions of children are dying in Africa and they are talking about that shit.
Joss Stone
2 Likes
It's so funny, because right now I'm very tired and my brains a little dead, I tend to get very focused and serious. So, I'm probably coming off a lot more like Scully right now.
Gillian Anderson
6 Likes
It's probably not a good idea to be chewing on a toothpick if you're talking to the president, because what if he tells a funny joke and you laugh so hard you spit the toothpick out and it hits him in the face or something.
Jack Handey
11 Likes
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I'm tired of crying, tired of people lying, I am tired of all of this! fu.. everything!
Unknown
168 Likes
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Keep the dream alive: Hit the snooze button...
Punit Ghadge
439 Likes
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Sorry the calendar played a cruel joke on you this year by making your birthday fall on a Monday.
Unknown
257 Likes
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My joke, which isn't really a joke, is that there will be one of two tours: the tour for the album that does well, or the tour for the album that stiffs.
Richard Marx
0 Likes
If someone in a work environment says a racist joke, I'm the kind of person who says, 'I'm sorry, I don't find that funny, and I'd appreciate if you don't tell those kinds of jokes when I'm around.' And you can be looked at as, 'Wow, he's the bummer in the party.' But I just don't go for that.
David Schwimmer
9 Likes
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